a_sporking_rat: rat (blue mouse)
a-sporking-rat ([personal profile] a_sporking_rat) wrote2013-07-20 12:05 pm

BULLET: SUMMARY

I'll be posting the first spork of Hit List on Monday, but in the meantime, here's a recap of Bullet.


Ch. 1 - Anita has to deliver a hat to a performance where only Aryan mothers exist. She has a creepily suggestive interaction with a toddler. Monica is derided not for handing a human over to vampires five years ago, but for daring to be a single working mom who dates. She gets her vengence with a sick burn regarding Anita's hypocrisy.

Ch. 2 - Everyone is absurdly overdressed for the recital. Asher sexually harasses Micah. Monica is a Jealous Hater Who Sucks.

Ch. 3 - Anita's boytoys are the best in the performance despite probably having the least experience next to the toddlers. Anita blames Asher for 'ruining the moment' for looking unhappy in the background over something while she's being group-hugged by some of the other harem.

Ch. 4- The big weretiger secret that was not kept much of a secret at all by Crispin and Domino is letting therians potentially have babies now. This causes drama/angst because Vivian wants kids and Stephen doesn't and Anita wonders if her men want kids. Also people who were victimized in the past in horribly traumatic ways are derided for having an symptoms of trauma.

Ch. 5 - They all talk a lot about sex because Asher is so mad over not getting any that he may leave the city.

Ch. 6 - Richard shows up and they talk about sex even more. An orgy is agreed to in order to save their power base and keep Asher from leaving.

Ch. 7- We learn common color schemes for JC's bedroom to be decorated in. Richard talks a lot about his issues and how everything is his fault and how all the other wereanimal leaders think that JC and Anita in charge is the best thing ever. Asher understandably thinks Richard must be on drugs, but they finally end up cuddling.

Ch. 8 - Richard gets rough with Asher. Anita describes her own breasts as "creamy goodness". Anita acknowledges that the therians of this city are "possessions" to them and that's fine. Richard throws Anita on the bed.

Ch. 9 - Jean-Claude has dark blue eyes. Anita can't decide if she wants to consent or not with Richard, so the decision gets made for her. Sex finally happens after having been agreed to THREE CHAPTERS AGO.

Ch. 10 & 11 - A bit of the old in-out. Personified penises. Anita supposedly too short for regular missionary. No woman but Anita can handle a deep dicking. Then Belle Morte shows up just as they all get done.

Ch. 12 - Belle Morte and Padma have appear to Anita & Co. in a psychic vision to...kill them or tame them or talk to them a whole lot so they know exactly what's going on and what to do about it. What's going on is that MOAD isn't dead, she's possessing the Council and many others, and therefore has made them obsessed with Anita just like she is. We learn that Anita is more of a Sue yet because she take the powers of any vampire that attacks her. Also, so you know, Damian has the palest skin in the St. Louis Kiss.

Ch. 13 - Bibiana calls and tells Anita how to defeat the MOAD, which involves on Anita becoming even more special and powerful and having lots of weretiger sex. Anita for some reason disbelieves weretiger legends despite them lining up perfectly with everything we know so far to be true. It gets said that Anita has a good moral compass, let alone a moral compass at all, which I feel is hilarious enough to be given special mention.

Ch. 14 - It is decided that Haven has to die for actually showing up when Anita calls him. In fact, this apparently means he WANTS to die, so killing him is okay. It's also okay to "shop for" other human beings for sexual purposes.

Ch. 15 - We learn what everyone is wearing, and there is pointless talking over headsets with pointless codenames over letting Haven in.

Ch. 16 - Noel dies while Anita is making out with Haven

Ch. 17- Magical sparkly energy heals Noel, but expending this energy makes them all want to feed on flesh and blood, which will probably be the newly-healed Noel. Morte D'Amour, possessed by MOAD, shows up for two seconds in hopes of feeding on Noel's death at their hands, but then leaves when JC and Anita turn that killing urge into the ardeur so they have an orgy instead of eating Noel.

Ch. 18 - Anita's only reaction to realizing she raped someone in the orgy is being glad she wasn't the one the wife will blame for the scratch marks on him. We learn that true love repels the ardeur, therefore clearly Anita doesn't love anyone, but JC assures her that's not the case in a way that totally makes no sense. JC decides to stop the MOAD in a way that will conveniently make him the Vampire King of America. Richard and Anita acknowledge that his ideas on how to do so are evil, but agree in order to save the country from the MOAD.

Ch. 19 - Anita takes a shower. Haven wants to join her but she says no.

Ch. 20 - Anita emerges from shower and talks with Haven. He praises her for being so sexy and sexual and Not Like Other Girls but also says she won't let a guy be a guy. Because she's such a guy, see? But you know, sexy, not butch, eww! Gushing over what a good person Micah is by both parties. Haven tries to rape Anita, but she scares him off by threatening to mind-wipe him like she did Nicky.

Ch. 21- Anita can take more vampire bites than you. New werelionesses Kelly and Rosamond are introduced, and side with her against Haven, as does Claudia.

Ch. 22 - The four women vs Haven. Actual physical fighting happens, but Anita doesn't do anything after making a couple of knife slashes against Haven. She just watches Kelly and Claudia kick ass, and does nothing when Kelly is knocked out and Claudia left to take on Haven alone. Rosamond went down and was dazed, Anita, what's your excuse?

Ch. 23 - Claudia is giving it to Haven good, but then he shoots her in the arm. Anita shoots Haven. Haven fires too, but has hit Noel and Nathaniel instead.

Ch. 24 - Anita goes to Nathaniel, who is alive. Noel is not, because he pushed Nathaniel out of the way of the bullet. Nathaniel is injured though, so I guess it still grazed him, or went through him, or there was more than one bullet. Haven is still alive, and says he shot Nathaniel because Anita loves him more. Anita kills Haven.

Ch. 25. - Jean-Claude has a black velvet robe with a fur collar and Anita is sitting on his bed. We are told about how Nathaniel has picked out color-coordinated dinnerware for both home and the Circus. She has some coffee and JC tells her that Nathaniel is going to be fine. Richard and Anita hold her (of course) and explain to her that Haven tried to kill Nathaniel because Anita was the first person he ever loved and he wanted to hurt her for loving other people because that hurt him and everything is only ever about Anita, specifically about loving her if you're a male.

Ch. 26 - Damian has a favorite robe that looks like a long Victorian smoking jacket. Sigmund is mentioned. Anita has to spend this entire chapter being persuaded to eat and nap so that Nathaniel can heal and won't drain her and Damian, and so that she can keep going without draining Damian and Nathaniel for food.

Ch. 27 - Jacob calls Anita to tell her that a hit is out on her, JC, and Richard. He also tells her that he had no choice but to call her even though he didn't want to, because she still has holds on him from when she rolled him in Flirt. Anita thinks it's fine to exploit this and says she'll make him bring his Pride to St. Louis if they need extra muscle. She plans to find and kill the assassins that were sent, since she and Jacob somehow magically know that someone else took the hit contract after Jacob turned it down and that they're already in town.

Ch. 28 - Anita wants to warn Richard about the assassins, but he's out on a date. She can't text, so Stephen sends him one. She then uses her telepathic connections to contact him. He's driving home, and doesn't want to hide at the Circus. Then he gets shot.

Ch. 29 - Jamil and Shang-Da volunteer their life energy to Anita if she'll use it to help heal Richard. With anyone else, she'd get the energy through sex, but since these guys aren't white, she just drains it out of them like she did with Chimera, leaving them as living mummies. After sending it to Richard so he can use it to heal swifter and get away, she has a lot of excess left over...so instead of giving it back to Jamil and Shang-Da, she gives it to Nathaniel, Claudia, Kelly, and Rosamond, who would have all healed fine on their own without it and who Jamil and Shang-Da did NOT volunteer it for. Only after she does this does she bother to return the dregs of the energy to them so they're no longer shriveled husks that are screaming in pain. Lucky for them, it turned out she had just enough juice left for that! So it's okay she risked running out of it by healing all those other people before them, right?

Ch. 30 - Anita has her eyes temporarily completely black. This is the 'cost' of the power she just used. A Marshal named Finnegan calls her from Georgia and asks her to watch a crime scene video. It's urgent, but they talk a ton about irrelevant things before the call ends, and he kisses Anita's ass a lot. She, Nicky, and Damian go to the computer room. Valentina is there looking at pictures of gore and torture. After she leaves, Nicky and Damian urge Anita to kill her in case she hurts someone one day. They spend the whole chapter debating it.

Ch 31. -Anita actually watches the video. It's a crypt full of slaughtered humans and the vampires who did the slaughtering, including the Master who is a rotting vampire. Because Morgan, the vampire executioner who 'killed' the Master, is not as smart and savvy and cool as Anita, he doesn't realize how hard rotters are to kill nor how to kill them and learned from books rather in the field like super cool Anita. He thinks he's killed the Master, Anita schools him on why he hasn't. Then the Master comes out the crypt and probably kills him. Then she gets a call from Jake, a Harlequin werewolf, telling her that someone is killing weretigers and he's got a bunch he's bringing to her to keep safe.

Ch. 32 - Jake pimps the weretigers out to Anita because the only way to defeat MOAD is for Anita and JC to fuck them and make one her animal to call. Yes, really. Jake talks about what a good and moral person Anita is. Yes, really. It turns out that one of Anita's powers is to call all male weretigers. YES, REALLY.

Ch. 33 - Anita again has to educate law enforcement in Atlanta about how rotting vampires work and how to stop one. She decides not to help them personally because she doesn't like how they're spooked by her psychic powers even though she knows her necromancy could help her find Clayton and end his killing spree sooner.

Ch. 34 - Anita asks Jake what he knows about Brides and is creepily interested in how many she can make. She decides to get Jean-Claude's help in picking out a weretiger sex slave for herself, since the thought of screwing someone she doesn't know and picking an unwilling partner out of a lineup makes her a little uncomfy. She chalks this up to being a woman.

Ch. 35 - It is decreed that Micah knows best and he'll be the one to pick, with input from the other men, on who the new harem member will be, while Anita will get no say and instead be whisked off to the gym to work out even though time is obviously of the essence here. There is also mention of a swanmane who only has sex with women because she was treated badly by a man. Said swanmane and JJ have now fallen in faux-love because of the ardeur. This is terrible not because their free will has been taken, but because they won't let Jason join in. And then it becomes all about Anita somehow too and her needing to be comforted and told it's not her fault. She's also not upset about these girls being mindwiped and their emotions manipulated magically, but at screwing things up for Jason. Only men matter, and the only thing that matters more than men is Anita Anita ANITA.

Ch. 36 - Anita goes to the gym and outruns everyone and teases them about it right after saying she isn't there to race, then wants to have a punching competition. All the men think she is awesome and she is given a cool nickname by the wererats that I personally think is a coded accusation disguised as a compliment.

Ch. 37 - Anita wins the punching bag competition and then nearly passes out from having over-worked herself so much in order to best everyone else. This would be stupid and prideful enough at the best of times, but right now both the MOAD and hit men are after her, and she's let herself become weakened for no good reason except to remind the guards that she's Cooler Than Them.

Ch. 38 - Anita has to be made to drink a shake after all that. Made. We learn about how screw-top cups are hard to clean, and that Haven apparently ran his Pride in a way really oppressive to the women, which Anita never bothered to find out about when he was alive, let alone do shit about. Everyone assures her more that she did the right thing by killing him and it wasn't her fault, even though she has yet to sincerely think anything to the contrary so far. We are also reminded that Nicky is OMG TOTALLY A SOCIOPATH without Anita's rule over him, so it's okay that his free will was taken. Anita decides that, rather than protecting weaker werelions from now on like she told Haven they should, said weaker ones either have to learn to defend themselves from the stronger ones or leave the Pride. She phrases this in the most victim-blaming way possible too, of course.

Ch. 39 - Time at last to meet the weretigers! Well, Jake's golden ones at least. The others are still waiting. The first six pages have are spent mostly about who is standing where and who is wearing what. There are two men, Pride and Mephistopheles, and one woman, Envy. Anita of course only pays attention to the men, first by antagonizing them in ways that are originally just obnoxious, such as making fun of their names, but quickly go to wanting them to tell her all about the traumatic nature of their upbringing within five minutes of meeting them just because she's curious. She thinks they're arrogant for not being thrilled about this, and openly says she dislikes them for it. Then she wants to know who is going to kiss her first so as to test if their beast will bond with her. This will be decided by her seeing if Pride or Meph smells better (Envy is of course not even considered or mentioned, just sort of standing somewhere in the same room silently) which involves them taking off their shirts and sandwiching her.

Ch. 40 - JC and Richard do Envy, Anita gets off on it. She starts getting sexy with Meph, and she and Micah use their beasts to do something or other not-really-clear thing with him.

Ch. 41 -Anita freaks out by how turned on she was watching Richard and JC with Envy. There is a lot of talking about it, none of which makes any logic or sense at all. She, Asher, Micah, Nathaniel, and Meph head to the bedroom for an orgy, she gets cold feet but Micah pressures and manipulates her into agreeing to it. She finds out that Micah warped Meph's mind like she usually does to men when they did the beast thing last chapter, and is not bothered by it.

Ch. 42 - There is fifteen pages yet they don't get to the sex. Anita shows off her scars. Meph checks out Asher's scars. We get two paragraphs about the scar on Asher's balls. Asher informs Meph that vampires apparently can't give head without getting their teeth involved in painful ways.

Ch. 43 - Sex happens. We find out Meph's twin sister is named Good Angel and his nickname is Devil. Seriously.

Ch. 44 - The first paragraph is about how piss-scared the vampire world is, how they're now willing to turn to JC, etc. The solution turns out to be a cocktail party with the tiger clans, and the entire seven pages is devoted to Anita being made to put on the itty-bitty see-through sex club dress she'll be wearing to it even though it is six hours till dark, when the MOAD and the Council will strike again.

Ch. 45 - Anita assaults a weretiger woman, Julia, in a very rapey way on the rather shakey claim that the woman 'challenged' her. Actually, I think it's because the poor girl seems to be the girlfriend of Victor, the white tiger prince that Anita banged once in Skin Trade. Victor makes out with Anita afterward and their tigers merge and make her queen of the white tigers.

Ch. 46 - Anita finds Yiyu, whom she refers to as Jade because her name means Black Jade, a black tiger and servant of the Harlequin who was sent in as a spy to see if Anita is truly worthy and capable of being Master of Tigers. Anita sexually assaults her while being fucked by Domino, but makes Jade like it using her tiger. She then breaks the Master/servant bond between Jade and her ambiguously-black abusive master, and Jade becomes hers instead. It's okay to own people if you treat them nice, right?

Ch. 47 - Through telepathy with Jade, Anita knows another spy is here, a golden weretiger man named Topaz. They find him and tie him up. He does not resist. Anita then gets in to a confrontation with Reba, the daughter of the Red Clan Queen, who does not want Anita to take over her people like she did the white tigers. Because Reba is another woman, she is not only hostile and cruel even to her own people, she also is absurdly weak in both supernatural terms and in terms of using the weapon she brought, which Anita is sure to smirk about before doing to her what she did to Julia. Despite all of LKH's attempts to villainize her, however, Reba is super awesome and says a lot of what I think we've all been thinking about Anita. Once Anita's done sexually assaulting a third woman in as many chapters, we go back to Topaz, who says Jade was sent in by the Harlequin precisely so Anita could do what she did and free her from her evil master. He also says that he was sent to be Anita's gold tiger if she hasn't found one yet, but since she has and she doesn't want to break the bond between he and his master since they love each other, Topaz escapes the DoomCrotch. He then gushes about how strong Anita is and how she can totally defeat the MOAD, and they all talk about how powerful love is.

Ch. 48- Basically the epilogue, with Anita summing up most of the loose ends, though not all of them. Basically, loads of REALLY COOL SHIT happened offscreen: Anita and Jake hunted down Padma and exorcised the MOAD from him, Richard hunted and killed the assassins while in wolf form in the woods, Clayton was brought down with flamethrowers, and the army fought a bunch of rotting vamps somewhere in Europe. All of which we are told about but never get to see, because I guess coktail parties and fucking weretigers and being the best at gym were all more important to write about. But what's REALLY important is Matthew is making Nathaniel want a baby and Anita refuses because not only do her careers not work with that, but their baby wouldn't have his pretty eyes! The End.

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