a-sporking-rat (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
a_sporking_rat) wrote2013-06-12 02:08 pm
a_sporking_rat) wrote2013-06-12 02:08 pm
Entry tags:
BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART 1
HOUSTON, WE HAVE TIGERS!
And rodents!
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/52798613902
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/52737226610
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/6585679/petspics-muffy-shout-and-scout
http://tinypawpets.tumblr.com/post/52561527579/how-freaking-cute-is-she#notes
http://tinypawpets.tumblr.com/post/52582067638#notes
http://rappsrats.tumblr.com/post/52544109205
http://rappsrats.tumblr.com/post/52541254299/mechromance-aww-guys-give-this-rat-some
http://fyeahmice.tumblr.com/post/52793392623
http://fyeahmice.tumblr.com/post/52561520030/felineslove-i-siostrzyczka-pana-ponizej-d
BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART 1
"The drapes had been stripped around the living room so that the carpeted area looked like an island in the middle of the bare rock walls and the carpeted floor" This is a cool visual, though it seems weird to me to dress down the room when you're having guests. You'd think JC would fancy it up to the nines.
Nathaniel squeezes her hand and "kept us moving forward" and is smiling because "his day job as a stripper had taught him how to smile and be charming when he didn't really feel like it. None of my jobs taught me how to be charming, strangely." It is strange that having a job (animator) that makes you work with people on a daily basis, especially in what's one of the most sensitive situations they could be in, hasn't at least taught you how to smile when you don't want to. Micah comes over to them and she spends a paragraph talking about how he's in black jeans and a black T-shirt and how it's odd to see him in that outfit because usually when he's off work, whatever that is (I know he runs the Furry Coalition but unless he requires dues, that's not a job, that's volunteer work), he wears "faded jeans and colorful T-shirts" and how he "really wasn't that fond of black outside his suits" for work (again, whatever that is) and how his belt made his waist look tiny and the entire outfit emphasizes his delicacy and how his "saving grace" from it (because being delicate is bad? that's what 'saving grace' usually implies) is how his tight shirt shows off his muscles but even those are "in miniature" and how she doesn't usually think of Micah as all that small (despite mentioning it every time he's on-screen) because he's her size (despite the fact she mentions how small she is all the time) and how he has long dark brown curling hair and triangular face and amazing eyes and "simply beautiful in a very girl way" and he wears suits because it "helped him look like a grown-up"...so right now he looks like a kid then? Reminds me of how she mentioned in Flirt that Jon supposedly wears that beard so as not to look like a kid and thus get hit on by those dang predatory gay men. And then she wonders why he is dressing so unlike himself. Maybe to look good, Anita?
He smooches her, she smiles, he smiles back, he kisses Nathaniel and it's the only time since the recital they've kissed in public (because that might suggest to people watching that someone other than Anita owns these guys!) and Nathaniel kisses him back and Anita thinks that Micah "like the clothes he had done it on purpose." Well, yes, when someone kisses someone, it is generally on purpose. I guess she means why he chose now to start kissing Nathaniel in public...my guess would be she means it's some sort of claim/show for the weretigers. Anita comes to the same conclusion but still plans to ask him about it later. Micah then takes Nathaniel's hand to lead them. Anita tells us how he'd totally rather take her hand, but she's already holding Nathaniel's so her only free hand is her gun hand and she's told them that she doesn't like them holding her gun hand but she sure wishes he'd hold it now because "what was waiting for us wasn't a matter of guns." Wow, Anita knows that situations that aren't solved with guns exist? Oh wait, yes, she does, because there's also those solved by fucking, like this one shall doubtlessly be!
"Micah led us to the carpeted area" This is such a hilarious mental image, the three of them holding hands like preschool kids. She glances at the corner where Haven died and thinks about how even though the blood has been cleaned up the wereanimal guests will still smell the bleach. Considering the violent culture most therians (wolves, lions) seem to run on, I doubt that Harlequin weretigers are going to be bothered that there had been blood spilled here, Anita. Don't worry about it.
Jake is standing with Claudia, already wearing the "unofficial uniform for our guards" and Claudia looks just fine. Anita says that "the fact that she'd healed this completely this fast said just how powerful a wererat she was." Uh, you sent the life energy of Jamil and Shang-Da into her, remember? Same as you did Nathaniel and the werelionesses and Richard? It has nothing to do with her own power. I'm sure she is powerful, but that's not why she's okay now. Nathaniel is just fine too, and healed just as fast, for the same reason, and he's not powerful at all, see? Wicked and Truth are there too, and Nicky and Dino are behind our trio. Jean-Claude is on a loveseat near the fireplace in "his normal look: tight pants and tall black boots, both made of intricately sewn leather, so that his lower body looked like it was bound in thin leather strips" and a white shirt with a lacy front and a black velvet jacket and that antique cameo pin I think Anita mentioned him wearing at the recital, because she also mentions, as she did then, that she'd gotten him it for Christmas. And then we get a load about what Asher, who is sitting next to him, is wearing--smooth leather "painted on" pants and a white tuxedo shirt and a smile that "wasn't a real one. It was a smile that could either be happy or turn to harsh cruelty." How does that make it not real? Oh, by the way, he has golden hair!
Talking about what these two are wearing takes about a full page. The only interesting bit is that Anita thinks his smile means that "there was something about our guests that Asher didn't like." Actually, I bet it's because Anita kept them all waiting so damn long with her nonsense in the gym.
Wolf-Richard is at Asher's side, and Anita realizes she doesn't know how to greet Richard in wolf form. She's been Lupa and a Human Servant of a MotC who calls wolves for ages, not to mention calls them herself, you'd think that's a bit of etiquette she'd have picked up long ago. Asher smooches her gun hand but his eyes are unhappy and she wants to ask why but has to wait, wolf-Richard bumps her leg with his head and makes her stagger, she pets him, he doesn't look happy either. "What the hell could have put Asher and Richard on the same side of unhappy? Other than both being pissy, they had a lot of the same issue buttons." Or maybe she put "didn't have a lot of the same issue buttons" I'm too lazy to go back and check. Either way, maybe he doesn't like being petted like a dog and is worrying that you doing so to him will give the weretiger guests the impression you're either an idiot newbie to supernatural culture or an asshole that regards therians as big pets (which you are). But, hey, let's say Asher and Richard do have the same reason. I think what it is should be really, really obvious: The new tigers. If Richard knows anything about where they came from and how they were raised for this and how they're being pimped out to Anita, he's the type (read: decent human being) who would see a lot of moral problems with this whole situation. As for Asher, he's said he doesn't want another straight or straight-leaning man in the harem, and since Micah was tasked with picking someone who will be a good match for Anita, and Nathaniel specifically said Anita won't want a mostly-gay man (yeah, I guess he doesn't know about Byron) and the candidates that were chosen were two guys and a girl...most likely either a woman or a straight man is coming into the harem, which is exactly what I think Asher said was going to make him snap and hurt somebody.
"I had to fight the urge to ask him, What's wrong, boy? like he was Lassie or something." Oh you suck, woman. She takes Asher's offered arm and thinks about how "if I had to go for a gun, I was screwed." Again, I think Anita just might know that she's about to try to RAPE therians that turn into one of the largest predators on land. "The wolf walked ahead of us and lay down beside the loveseat at Jean-Claude's side like a good dog." Uggggh.
There are two men there she doesn't know sitting in overstuffed chairs and Anita assumes them to be the gold tigers. Wasn't there a third? A female? Micah said there was...I guess he realized it'd be a good idea to get her the hell out of there before Anita arrived. Maybe he just made her up to make Anita finally move her ass and come visit the golden weretigers already in order to put a kibosh on adding her to the harem. Not to mention the Vegas weretigers are STILL waiting elsewhere! I guess they couldn't do both meetings in one for some supernatural manners reason. "Since I still had Nathaniel's hand and he still had Micah by the hand, Asher led us all to Jean-Claude" THEY ARE A CONGA LINE AT THIS POINT HAHAHA. Asher twirls her into the loveseat beside Jean-Claude, giving up his own seat next to him and moves away, and Micah sits down with her....don't loveseats only have room for two? I guess since they're both so ~itty bitty~ they can fit. "Maybe that was what was upsetting Asher, that he had to move off the loveseat." Uhhhh probably not. Anita, you may be that petty, but I don't think he is. More likely he's moving off the loveseat because he's pissed, not vice versa, and that twirl is a spiteful little gesture that's too subtle for you to notice as an insult. She thinks it might be something else though. How brilliant on her part. "There better really be something wrong and not just the two of them being pissy" OH YOU MEAN LIKE HOW YOU ARE ALL THE TIME "because for my tension level to rise this way there better be a damn good reason." Oh that is RICH.
JC holds her to him and speaks in her head "spreading shivers down my skin. Mind-to-mind communication wasn't always this titillating with Jean-Claude. What was up?" My bet is that Asher and Richard have some very legitimate beef with Anita and JC is trying to get her all buttered up and in a good mood before they have a chance to voice their grievances to her and thus face her resultant wrath. Anyway, he telepathically tells her that there's something different about these weretigers from others but he doesn't know what. Anita thinks he's afraid of them. He says they're not his animal to call nor Asher's, but that maybe Anita can tell what's wrong with them.
...my bet is they're not happy about being treated like chattel and pimped out like property.
Micah has his hand on her thigh...and Nathaniel sits on the floor, on the opposite side of JC's legs from wolf-Richard. Yeah, wow, this speaks for itself. Dino and Nicky, meanwhile, go to flank the weretiger men with Jake and Claudia. About six pages have now been spent that have mostly been about who is standing where and who is wearing what. The latter is irrelevant and should be scrapped entirely, the former could have been done much more economically, probably in one or two paragraphs. Anita mentions that she isn't sure Jake would help her lot against the golden weretigers "if the shit hit the fan. He could pretend not to care about them, but it was a lie." And again, I bring up my theory that she not only knows just how wrong this is, but expects her victims might try to defend themselves.
An entire page save for ONE SENTENCE is then spent describing what said victims-to-be look like. I'll make it easy on you and sum it up in jot list format
- Both are tall and athletic looking
- Both have strong and handsome faces
- Both have arrogant expressions
- One has curly yellow hair that falls around his ears, a triangular chin, and "the palest brown eyes I'd ever seen" to the point that she thinks "brown eyes shouldn't look pale in a golden-tanned face" whatever logic that is.
- The other one has similar hair except that it's straight "with only the slightest wave to it" and eyes that are "pale blue and gold, or brown, as if blue eyes could be hazel." Blue and hazel are two different colors though, isn't that like saying 'as if red could be green'? I've heard someone described as having "hazely blue" eyes before, maybe that's what she means?
- Both have golden skin that she at first thinks is a tan but then wonders if it's maybe "just their skin color" naturally. "But no one, not even clan tigers, had skin that was pale gold, almost yellow, as if their skin were warmed by the sun even inside." Maybe that's because the clan tigers you've met so far were all NOT golden? The white tigers are all really pale with white hair, the red tiger you fucked in Skin Trade had pigment-red hair, Cynric has blue hair, and Sebastian the black tiger had black hair, how is it somehow impossible for her to process that the golden tigers might have a golden-tan look to their skin when it in fact perfectly follows the pattern of clan tigers as having coloration matching their animal forms?
Also, I like how golden tigers get to have a golden tan, white tigers get to be nearly-albino, but the black tiger wasn't mentioned as having dark skin, nor was the red one mentioned as having skin that was ruddy, coppery, or anything to suggest something the slightest bit different from ordinary Euro-Caucasian peach (not that white people can't also have those skin tones, though Anita seems unaware of that). Much like Richard's tan versus the ~creamy goodness~! of the vampire harem members, Anita's lovers can be tan or pale so long as they're still white guys. A little "not quite whitebread" in the family tree way back is allowed, but no actually looking like you might possibly be PoC! (I give Cynric a pass on this because no human race nor mammalian species that I know of can have blue skin, even if it's like Russian cat gray-blue.)
Anita introduces herself. The man with straight hair and blue hazel eyes says his name is Mephistopheles. Anita asks what he goes by, he says just that. She waits for him to smile at her "but he just gave me serious arrogant handsome. There was no smile coming." Remember how Domino started out that way too? Just wait until she gets her hooks in you, Mephy. Get your dirty looks in now, while you still can!
The one with curly hair says that his name is Pride, she asks him again, he repeats "a touch apologetic" that his name is Pride. "I wanted to ask if their mother hadn't liked them, but resisted." Isn't this woman nearly thirty? That's really immature. And she's boned guys named Requiem, Wicked, and Truth, so honestly these can't seem that bizarre to her. "I turned to Micah. I gave him a look that I hoped said clearly, These are the best of the five?"
WHAT THE FUCK, WOMAN. Look, these aren't just presents to you for your pleasure, okay? It has been made clear that it is a very urgent matter, absurd plot or not, that you bone and bind them in order to SAVE YOUR PEOPLE AND ALL OF SUPERNATURAL AMERICA FROM THE MOAD. What they look like, how they act, what their names are, that shit is irrelevant! Hell, it's ridiculously convenient as it is that they just happen to be conventionally handsome young built studs instead of a pair of Average Joes, middle-aged, tubby, or all of the above!
Micah responds just by telling her that one of the others is named Envy. Instead of just leaving it alone and moving on, as would be both the polite and sensible thing to do, Anita makes a comment about how elementary school must have been interesting for them. Pride says they were homeschooled, and she replies with "I'll just bet you were" which honestly sounds just plain antagonistic to me more than anything. Rather than telepathically smacking her as he should, Jean-Claude simply mind-asks her if she senses what he was saying about them. "I sensed they they were arrogant and way too full of themselves" OH LOOK WHO'S TALKING. JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT BOWING AT YOUR FEET. "but suspected that part of it was bravado. Bravado always hides fear, or at least uncertainty." Anita the psychologist, oh goodie.
Anita repeats "You were homeschooled" out loud, Pride says that's what he just said, Anita asks if they've ever been this far from home, Pride says no, Meph asks why that matters and "his arrogance went up a notch to almost angry." Questioning Anita, how arrogant! "He was hiding it well, but he wasn't comfortable." You know what, Anita, they have every reason to be afraid and hostile towards you, quit judging them if they seem on-edge...which honestly they really don't to me, especially compared to what an ass Anita is already being for no reason. Anita says she's just trying to get a feel for things. Pride says her Nimir-Raj picked them for her, Anita says "And I'm going to be talking to him about that earlier." Annnnd now she's just outright insulted them! Anita, these people have been cloistered away from society, bred like animals, and are now being offered to you as sexual objects, do you really think you need to attack their self-esteem too? That goes beyond rude and right into CRUEL. Micah justifies his choices by whispering (as if wereanimals can't hear that!) that "the others were more scared, or angrier." GEE, I WONDER WHY.
Anita puts her hand on his thigh and thinks about how she wants to "be comforted" because "I didn't like these men. I sure as hell didn't want to keep them permanently." I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO SAY EVERYTHING WRONG ABOUT THIS, IT MAKES ME TOO ANGRY. Nathaniel starts groping her calf, and she mentions that not only is she wearing boots he picked out for her but that she can tell he doesn't like the men either. She also concludes that Asher and Richard are pissed for this reason as well. "None of us were happy with them" THAT IS NOT THE POINT OF THEM BEING GIVEN TO YOU, STUPID, REMEMBER? "Jake and I would soooo be having words later." Yes, she really used four Os for that.
Anita asks the tigers if they really want to stay. Pride says they were told they didn't have a choice. Anita claims that "I'm a big believer in choices" and I'm just going to point now at Joseph, the harem, etc., which all illustrate what a load of bull that is better than anything I could say. Meph says that "if we leave here, they'll kill us" Yeah, that's Anita's brand of choice, Meph---technically you might have one, like with Joseph, but it's fucking terrible. Anita says it's one thing for them to stay at the Circus till it's safe but that what she's really asking is if the two of them want "to be our tigers?" Pride wisely asks what she'll do if they say they don't, she claims "I really don't like to force people to do anything." In addition to being a big fat lie, I'd also like to point out that she's evading the question.
Meph says"That's not what we heard" and Anita asks what they heard and "anger trickled into the words". Yeah, she doesn't like being called out with facts. Which is just what the tigers do--Pride asks if didn't she make Nicky her Bride? She answers yes, he says that's force. Anita monologues internally for a paragraph about how she would totally explain to them how she'd only done it to save her men, that Nicky was a bad man who had kidnapped her, that it was the only weapon she'd had, etc., all of which she reminds the readers of, but she just doesn't know them well enough to explain this to them "so what could I say?"
...I do not understand this line of reasoning at all. So she just agrees with them. Meph asks then how is it she claims she doesn't want to force them, Anita says that "I'm not wanting to add to my list of sins today." Meph asks her what that means, Anita says it means that "taking someone's free will away forever seems sort of evil to me. I'd rather not do it again." SORT OF EVIL. JUST SORT OF. Pride asks what would cause her to do it again. I find this wise of him; he seems to get that Anita-justifications are not Earth-justifications and thus can't be taken for granted as logical and just. Anita says "Self-preservation, or protecting the people I love." Pride asks Nicky if he threatened Anita and her people...because we need it to be explained TWICE in one page how Anita was totally justified and totally had to do it, I guess. Nicky says yes, Pride asks how, Nicky asks Anita if he can tell them, she says sure...I thought she didn't know them well enough to explain it? But it's fine if Nicky does? What? Anyway Nicky gives the whole story, making it very much sound, of course, just like I'm sure Anita sees it, and Meph asks if Nicky blames her. Nicky says no, Meph asks why not, Nicky says he doesn't think he can blame her, that "I just want to please her." He seems to bring that up every time he talks. I think LKH gets off on it being said over and over.
Pride remarks that "So he really is a Bride in the full sense of the term." All Anita does is shrug when she says apparently so, and somehow from this Pride gets "But you don't like it. It bothers you that he has no free will." She agrees, the liar, and Pride asks why, she asks if it wouldn't bother him, he and Meph shake their heads. Given how they seem to have been raised, I'm going to give them a pass on that. After all, their free wills have never mattered so far in this story, have probably never mattered in their entire lives, so why should they see the free will of other wereanimals-enslaved-to-a-vampire-or-close as mattering? Anita, on the other hand, does not get a pass and never will, and I do not buy her claims on feeling bad for a second.
And rodents!
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/52798613902
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/52737226610
http://many-splendored-rat.tumblr.com/post/6585679/petspics-muffy-shout-and-scout
http://tinypawpets.tumblr.com/post/52561527579/how-freaking-cute-is-she#notes
http://tinypawpets.tumblr.com/post/52582067638#notes
http://rappsrats.tumblr.com/post/52544109205
http://rappsrats.tumblr.com/post/52541254299/mechromance-aww-guys-give-this-rat-some
http://fyeahmice.tumblr.com/post/52793392623
http://fyeahmice.tumblr.com/post/52561520030/felineslove-i-siostrzyczka-pana-ponizej-d
BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART 1
"The drapes had been stripped around the living room so that the carpeted area looked like an island in the middle of the bare rock walls and the carpeted floor" This is a cool visual, though it seems weird to me to dress down the room when you're having guests. You'd think JC would fancy it up to the nines.
Nathaniel squeezes her hand and "kept us moving forward" and is smiling because "his day job as a stripper had taught him how to smile and be charming when he didn't really feel like it. None of my jobs taught me how to be charming, strangely." It is strange that having a job (animator) that makes you work with people on a daily basis, especially in what's one of the most sensitive situations they could be in, hasn't at least taught you how to smile when you don't want to. Micah comes over to them and she spends a paragraph talking about how he's in black jeans and a black T-shirt and how it's odd to see him in that outfit because usually when he's off work, whatever that is (I know he runs the Furry Coalition but unless he requires dues, that's not a job, that's volunteer work), he wears "faded jeans and colorful T-shirts" and how he "really wasn't that fond of black outside his suits" for work (again, whatever that is) and how his belt made his waist look tiny and the entire outfit emphasizes his delicacy and how his "saving grace" from it (because being delicate is bad? that's what 'saving grace' usually implies) is how his tight shirt shows off his muscles but even those are "in miniature" and how she doesn't usually think of Micah as all that small (despite mentioning it every time he's on-screen) because he's her size (despite the fact she mentions how small she is all the time) and how he has long dark brown curling hair and triangular face and amazing eyes and "simply beautiful in a very girl way" and he wears suits because it "helped him look like a grown-up"...so right now he looks like a kid then? Reminds me of how she mentioned in Flirt that Jon supposedly wears that beard so as not to look like a kid and thus get hit on by those dang predatory gay men. And then she wonders why he is dressing so unlike himself. Maybe to look good, Anita?
He smooches her, she smiles, he smiles back, he kisses Nathaniel and it's the only time since the recital they've kissed in public (because that might suggest to people watching that someone other than Anita owns these guys!) and Nathaniel kisses him back and Anita thinks that Micah "like the clothes he had done it on purpose." Well, yes, when someone kisses someone, it is generally on purpose. I guess she means why he chose now to start kissing Nathaniel in public...my guess would be she means it's some sort of claim/show for the weretigers. Anita comes to the same conclusion but still plans to ask him about it later. Micah then takes Nathaniel's hand to lead them. Anita tells us how he'd totally rather take her hand, but she's already holding Nathaniel's so her only free hand is her gun hand and she's told them that she doesn't like them holding her gun hand but she sure wishes he'd hold it now because "what was waiting for us wasn't a matter of guns." Wow, Anita knows that situations that aren't solved with guns exist? Oh wait, yes, she does, because there's also those solved by fucking, like this one shall doubtlessly be!
"Micah led us to the carpeted area" This is such a hilarious mental image, the three of them holding hands like preschool kids. She glances at the corner where Haven died and thinks about how even though the blood has been cleaned up the wereanimal guests will still smell the bleach. Considering the violent culture most therians (wolves, lions) seem to run on, I doubt that Harlequin weretigers are going to be bothered that there had been blood spilled here, Anita. Don't worry about it.
Jake is standing with Claudia, already wearing the "unofficial uniform for our guards" and Claudia looks just fine. Anita says that "the fact that she'd healed this completely this fast said just how powerful a wererat she was." Uh, you sent the life energy of Jamil and Shang-Da into her, remember? Same as you did Nathaniel and the werelionesses and Richard? It has nothing to do with her own power. I'm sure she is powerful, but that's not why she's okay now. Nathaniel is just fine too, and healed just as fast, for the same reason, and he's not powerful at all, see? Wicked and Truth are there too, and Nicky and Dino are behind our trio. Jean-Claude is on a loveseat near the fireplace in "his normal look: tight pants and tall black boots, both made of intricately sewn leather, so that his lower body looked like it was bound in thin leather strips" and a white shirt with a lacy front and a black velvet jacket and that antique cameo pin I think Anita mentioned him wearing at the recital, because she also mentions, as she did then, that she'd gotten him it for Christmas. And then we get a load about what Asher, who is sitting next to him, is wearing--smooth leather "painted on" pants and a white tuxedo shirt and a smile that "wasn't a real one. It was a smile that could either be happy or turn to harsh cruelty." How does that make it not real? Oh, by the way, he has golden hair!
Talking about what these two are wearing takes about a full page. The only interesting bit is that Anita thinks his smile means that "there was something about our guests that Asher didn't like." Actually, I bet it's because Anita kept them all waiting so damn long with her nonsense in the gym.
Wolf-Richard is at Asher's side, and Anita realizes she doesn't know how to greet Richard in wolf form. She's been Lupa and a Human Servant of a MotC who calls wolves for ages, not to mention calls them herself, you'd think that's a bit of etiquette she'd have picked up long ago. Asher smooches her gun hand but his eyes are unhappy and she wants to ask why but has to wait, wolf-Richard bumps her leg with his head and makes her stagger, she pets him, he doesn't look happy either. "What the hell could have put Asher and Richard on the same side of unhappy? Other than both being pissy, they had a lot of the same issue buttons." Or maybe she put "didn't have a lot of the same issue buttons" I'm too lazy to go back and check. Either way, maybe he doesn't like being petted like a dog and is worrying that you doing so to him will give the weretiger guests the impression you're either an idiot newbie to supernatural culture or an asshole that regards therians as big pets (which you are). But, hey, let's say Asher and Richard do have the same reason. I think what it is should be really, really obvious: The new tigers. If Richard knows anything about where they came from and how they were raised for this and how they're being pimped out to Anita, he's the type (read: decent human being) who would see a lot of moral problems with this whole situation. As for Asher, he's said he doesn't want another straight or straight-leaning man in the harem, and since Micah was tasked with picking someone who will be a good match for Anita, and Nathaniel specifically said Anita won't want a mostly-gay man (yeah, I guess he doesn't know about Byron) and the candidates that were chosen were two guys and a girl...most likely either a woman or a straight man is coming into the harem, which is exactly what I think Asher said was going to make him snap and hurt somebody.
"I had to fight the urge to ask him, What's wrong, boy? like he was Lassie or something." Oh you suck, woman. She takes Asher's offered arm and thinks about how "if I had to go for a gun, I was screwed." Again, I think Anita just might know that she's about to try to RAPE therians that turn into one of the largest predators on land. "The wolf walked ahead of us and lay down beside the loveseat at Jean-Claude's side like a good dog." Uggggh.
There are two men there she doesn't know sitting in overstuffed chairs and Anita assumes them to be the gold tigers. Wasn't there a third? A female? Micah said there was...I guess he realized it'd be a good idea to get her the hell out of there before Anita arrived. Maybe he just made her up to make Anita finally move her ass and come visit the golden weretigers already in order to put a kibosh on adding her to the harem. Not to mention the Vegas weretigers are STILL waiting elsewhere! I guess they couldn't do both meetings in one for some supernatural manners reason. "Since I still had Nathaniel's hand and he still had Micah by the hand, Asher led us all to Jean-Claude" THEY ARE A CONGA LINE AT THIS POINT HAHAHA. Asher twirls her into the loveseat beside Jean-Claude, giving up his own seat next to him and moves away, and Micah sits down with her....don't loveseats only have room for two? I guess since they're both so ~itty bitty~ they can fit. "Maybe that was what was upsetting Asher, that he had to move off the loveseat." Uhhhh probably not. Anita, you may be that petty, but I don't think he is. More likely he's moving off the loveseat because he's pissed, not vice versa, and that twirl is a spiteful little gesture that's too subtle for you to notice as an insult. She thinks it might be something else though. How brilliant on her part. "There better really be something wrong and not just the two of them being pissy" OH YOU MEAN LIKE HOW YOU ARE ALL THE TIME "because for my tension level to rise this way there better be a damn good reason." Oh that is RICH.
JC holds her to him and speaks in her head "spreading shivers down my skin. Mind-to-mind communication wasn't always this titillating with Jean-Claude. What was up?" My bet is that Asher and Richard have some very legitimate beef with Anita and JC is trying to get her all buttered up and in a good mood before they have a chance to voice their grievances to her and thus face her resultant wrath. Anyway, he telepathically tells her that there's something different about these weretigers from others but he doesn't know what. Anita thinks he's afraid of them. He says they're not his animal to call nor Asher's, but that maybe Anita can tell what's wrong with them.
...my bet is they're not happy about being treated like chattel and pimped out like property.
Micah has his hand on her thigh...and Nathaniel sits on the floor, on the opposite side of JC's legs from wolf-Richard. Yeah, wow, this speaks for itself. Dino and Nicky, meanwhile, go to flank the weretiger men with Jake and Claudia. About six pages have now been spent that have mostly been about who is standing where and who is wearing what. The latter is irrelevant and should be scrapped entirely, the former could have been done much more economically, probably in one or two paragraphs. Anita mentions that she isn't sure Jake would help her lot against the golden weretigers "if the shit hit the fan. He could pretend not to care about them, but it was a lie." And again, I bring up my theory that she not only knows just how wrong this is, but expects her victims might try to defend themselves.
An entire page save for ONE SENTENCE is then spent describing what said victims-to-be look like. I'll make it easy on you and sum it up in jot list format
- Both are tall and athletic looking
- Both have strong and handsome faces
- Both have arrogant expressions
- One has curly yellow hair that falls around his ears, a triangular chin, and "the palest brown eyes I'd ever seen" to the point that she thinks "brown eyes shouldn't look pale in a golden-tanned face" whatever logic that is.
- The other one has similar hair except that it's straight "with only the slightest wave to it" and eyes that are "pale blue and gold, or brown, as if blue eyes could be hazel." Blue and hazel are two different colors though, isn't that like saying 'as if red could be green'? I've heard someone described as having "hazely blue" eyes before, maybe that's what she means?
- Both have golden skin that she at first thinks is a tan but then wonders if it's maybe "just their skin color" naturally. "But no one, not even clan tigers, had skin that was pale gold, almost yellow, as if their skin were warmed by the sun even inside." Maybe that's because the clan tigers you've met so far were all NOT golden? The white tigers are all really pale with white hair, the red tiger you fucked in Skin Trade had pigment-red hair, Cynric has blue hair, and Sebastian the black tiger had black hair, how is it somehow impossible for her to process that the golden tigers might have a golden-tan look to their skin when it in fact perfectly follows the pattern of clan tigers as having coloration matching their animal forms?
Also, I like how golden tigers get to have a golden tan, white tigers get to be nearly-albino, but the black tiger wasn't mentioned as having dark skin, nor was the red one mentioned as having skin that was ruddy, coppery, or anything to suggest something the slightest bit different from ordinary Euro-Caucasian peach (not that white people can't also have those skin tones, though Anita seems unaware of that). Much like Richard's tan versus the ~creamy goodness~! of the vampire harem members, Anita's lovers can be tan or pale so long as they're still white guys. A little "not quite whitebread" in the family tree way back is allowed, but no actually looking like you might possibly be PoC! (I give Cynric a pass on this because no human race nor mammalian species that I know of can have blue skin, even if it's like Russian cat gray-blue.)
Anita introduces herself. The man with straight hair and blue hazel eyes says his name is Mephistopheles. Anita asks what he goes by, he says just that. She waits for him to smile at her "but he just gave me serious arrogant handsome. There was no smile coming." Remember how Domino started out that way too? Just wait until she gets her hooks in you, Mephy. Get your dirty looks in now, while you still can!
The one with curly hair says that his name is Pride, she asks him again, he repeats "a touch apologetic" that his name is Pride. "I wanted to ask if their mother hadn't liked them, but resisted." Isn't this woman nearly thirty? That's really immature. And she's boned guys named Requiem, Wicked, and Truth, so honestly these can't seem that bizarre to her. "I turned to Micah. I gave him a look that I hoped said clearly, These are the best of the five?"
WHAT THE FUCK, WOMAN. Look, these aren't just presents to you for your pleasure, okay? It has been made clear that it is a very urgent matter, absurd plot or not, that you bone and bind them in order to SAVE YOUR PEOPLE AND ALL OF SUPERNATURAL AMERICA FROM THE MOAD. What they look like, how they act, what their names are, that shit is irrelevant! Hell, it's ridiculously convenient as it is that they just happen to be conventionally handsome young built studs instead of a pair of Average Joes, middle-aged, tubby, or all of the above!
Micah responds just by telling her that one of the others is named Envy. Instead of just leaving it alone and moving on, as would be both the polite and sensible thing to do, Anita makes a comment about how elementary school must have been interesting for them. Pride says they were homeschooled, and she replies with "I'll just bet you were" which honestly sounds just plain antagonistic to me more than anything. Rather than telepathically smacking her as he should, Jean-Claude simply mind-asks her if she senses what he was saying about them. "I sensed they they were arrogant and way too full of themselves" OH LOOK WHO'S TALKING. JUST BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT BOWING AT YOUR FEET. "but suspected that part of it was bravado. Bravado always hides fear, or at least uncertainty." Anita the psychologist, oh goodie.
Anita repeats "You were homeschooled" out loud, Pride says that's what he just said, Anita asks if they've ever been this far from home, Pride says no, Meph asks why that matters and "his arrogance went up a notch to almost angry." Questioning Anita, how arrogant! "He was hiding it well, but he wasn't comfortable." You know what, Anita, they have every reason to be afraid and hostile towards you, quit judging them if they seem on-edge...which honestly they really don't to me, especially compared to what an ass Anita is already being for no reason. Anita says she's just trying to get a feel for things. Pride says her Nimir-Raj picked them for her, Anita says "And I'm going to be talking to him about that earlier." Annnnd now she's just outright insulted them! Anita, these people have been cloistered away from society, bred like animals, and are now being offered to you as sexual objects, do you really think you need to attack their self-esteem too? That goes beyond rude and right into CRUEL. Micah justifies his choices by whispering (as if wereanimals can't hear that!) that "the others were more scared, or angrier." GEE, I WONDER WHY.
Anita puts her hand on his thigh and thinks about how she wants to "be comforted" because "I didn't like these men. I sure as hell didn't want to keep them permanently." I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO SAY EVERYTHING WRONG ABOUT THIS, IT MAKES ME TOO ANGRY. Nathaniel starts groping her calf, and she mentions that not only is she wearing boots he picked out for her but that she can tell he doesn't like the men either. She also concludes that Asher and Richard are pissed for this reason as well. "None of us were happy with them" THAT IS NOT THE POINT OF THEM BEING GIVEN TO YOU, STUPID, REMEMBER? "Jake and I would soooo be having words later." Yes, she really used four Os for that.
Anita asks the tigers if they really want to stay. Pride says they were told they didn't have a choice. Anita claims that "I'm a big believer in choices" and I'm just going to point now at Joseph, the harem, etc., which all illustrate what a load of bull that is better than anything I could say. Meph says that "if we leave here, they'll kill us" Yeah, that's Anita's brand of choice, Meph---technically you might have one, like with Joseph, but it's fucking terrible. Anita says it's one thing for them to stay at the Circus till it's safe but that what she's really asking is if the two of them want "to be our tigers?" Pride wisely asks what she'll do if they say they don't, she claims "I really don't like to force people to do anything." In addition to being a big fat lie, I'd also like to point out that she's evading the question.
Meph says"That's not what we heard" and Anita asks what they heard and "anger trickled into the words". Yeah, she doesn't like being called out with facts. Which is just what the tigers do--Pride asks if didn't she make Nicky her Bride? She answers yes, he says that's force. Anita monologues internally for a paragraph about how she would totally explain to them how she'd only done it to save her men, that Nicky was a bad man who had kidnapped her, that it was the only weapon she'd had, etc., all of which she reminds the readers of, but she just doesn't know them well enough to explain this to them "so what could I say?"
...I do not understand this line of reasoning at all. So she just agrees with them. Meph asks then how is it she claims she doesn't want to force them, Anita says that "I'm not wanting to add to my list of sins today." Meph asks her what that means, Anita says it means that "taking someone's free will away forever seems sort of evil to me. I'd rather not do it again." SORT OF EVIL. JUST SORT OF. Pride asks what would cause her to do it again. I find this wise of him; he seems to get that Anita-justifications are not Earth-justifications and thus can't be taken for granted as logical and just. Anita says "Self-preservation, or protecting the people I love." Pride asks Nicky if he threatened Anita and her people...because we need it to be explained TWICE in one page how Anita was totally justified and totally had to do it, I guess. Nicky says yes, Pride asks how, Nicky asks Anita if he can tell them, she says sure...I thought she didn't know them well enough to explain it? But it's fine if Nicky does? What? Anyway Nicky gives the whole story, making it very much sound, of course, just like I'm sure Anita sees it, and Meph asks if Nicky blames her. Nicky says no, Meph asks why not, Nicky says he doesn't think he can blame her, that "I just want to please her." He seems to bring that up every time he talks. I think LKH gets off on it being said over and over.
Pride remarks that "So he really is a Bride in the full sense of the term." All Anita does is shrug when she says apparently so, and somehow from this Pride gets "But you don't like it. It bothers you that he has no free will." She agrees, the liar, and Pride asks why, she asks if it wouldn't bother him, he and Meph shake their heads. Given how they seem to have been raised, I'm going to give them a pass on that. After all, their free wills have never mattered so far in this story, have probably never mattered in their entire lives, so why should they see the free will of other wereanimals-enslaved-to-a-vampire-or-close as mattering? Anita, on the other hand, does not get a pass and never will, and I do not buy her claims on feeling bad for a second.
no subject
And now the bitch finally arrives, spends five minutes staring slack-jawed at her lovers (the only explanation I can give for the needless clothing descriptions) before being incredibly rude to them, despite the fact that without their power, she and everyone she loves will be destroyed by the MOAD. They are a hundred thousand times more mature than any other character in the room (unless Nate has replaced Nathaniel again) and deserve so much better than this.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
...no. No it doesn't, alas.
no subject
She said that. She looked at these scared men, who were being handed over to be her toys, and she said, "Pity me for not wanting to keep them!"
Could Nan please dream of her being tortured in SvS? We could make a little paradox, where Nan describing something specific gives Lucille the intention to do it.
no subject
Hahaha, I like that plan!
no subject
no subject
no subject
1) Nicky is either a case of Brainwashing For The Greater Good or Heel Face Brainwashing
2) Anita is Love Hungry
3) Anita’s relationships are All Take And No Give, with Anita as the Taker
‘the Taker knows the Giver is insecure and wants to feel needed and wanted, so they manipulate and extort the Giver into giving them what they want in exchange for morsels of affection.’ Anita and Nathaniel, anyone?
4) Anita has a definite case of It’s all about me - she cannot understand why people might be unhappy with her or her choices. The narrative supports her, making it more a case of Protagonist Centred Morality
5) Anita is an Entitle Bastard - she feels entitles to the loyalty and respect of the preternatural community despite treating them badly
6) Remember Joseph? I would call that Disproportionate Retribution
7) Anita is a complete Karma Houdini - nothing bad ever happens to her no matter hw she screws up
8) Deus Sex Machina - the Ardeur/Arduer (LKH is inconsistent with her spelling)
9) The narrative has Double Standard Rape: Female on Male, both in-story (Anita) and in backstory (Raina abusing Richard is never presented as being as evil as how Gabriel treated Nathaniel, for example)
10) Hiding Behind Religion - my cross still glows for me, and the Archangel Michael manifests to protect me, so I can’t be evil!
11) Anita has a serious case of Moral Myopia, particularly surrounding sexual abuse and taking advantage of those one has a responsibility towards
12) Never My Fault - Anita had to kill Haven! It wasn’t her fault!
13) Selective Obliviousness - Anita just can’t understand anything that doesn’t fit in with her world view
14) Cast Full Of Pretty Boys
15) But Not Too Gay - Jean Claude can never be with another man unless Anita is in the middle
16) Chickification - Anita has changed from a woman who broke into the MOTC’s headquarters to a woman who needs her hand holding after every little thing
17) Micah definitely fits the Dude Looks Like A Lady tope
18) Everyone Is Bi
19) Masculine Girl, Feminine Boy - because Anita is tough!
20) Questionable Consent - all the damned time
no subject
no subject
The way the room was set up was a subtle message which made Jake want to wince. The small sea of luxury surrounding Jean-Claude and his court said, you have no power or status here. The seats were first taken by Asher and Jean-Claude, but Asher lost his position to Anita and her Nimir-Raj. It will not matter if Asher is your ally, for Jean-Claude is only concerned with power and has found more at the hands of his Servant. Jean-Claude's wolf nearly slunk over, trapped in his animal form as punishment for who-knew-what perceived slight. Anita's favoured leopard sat at her feet in imitation of the wolf's position. All of your status here relies on your standing in her eyes. The weakest leopard of our group is better off than the stronger wolf, because he does not stand against her.
So much to be learned from this, all of it painful.
It was more painful, though, to be there as silent witness while Mephistopheles and Pride proved that they had never been in a position to learn how to read those messages.
Jake kept his expression as bland as he could while he watched Anita's petulant anger grow with every question and comment. Too late to wish that the tigers had been taught flattery, taught to be paranoid about every word they spoke - there had been no way to know what sort of person the Master of Tigers would turn out to be, and an honourable person would not care for being desperately worshipped. Even a more intelligent one would be irritated by obvious lies; it had seemed in his charges' best interest - in the best interests of the Harlequin, he corrected himself (some things are unwise to even think) - to raise them in the way most likely to appeal.
Most would like having men at their call with strength of mind and will as well as strength of body (even if only for the challenge of breaking them). Most would appreciate the honesty of their reactions (if not for the reactions themselves, then for how much easier it would make training them to fit the style that was appreciated). Most would see these before them as rare prizes, instead of petulantly dismissing them.
He met Jean-Claude's sharp glance readily when Pride asked about the Bride. He was not the one who had told them, and there was no way to prove that he had arranged for them to be made aware of all the information he could gather on Anita.
He just wished it could have made a difference.
no subject
no subject
I had to write this. I had to point out what the room and their posturing was saying, and I wanted to explain why people who've been raised to believe that they don't have an automatic right to free will would be questioning her.
no subject
no subject
2. She's making Micah sound like a goddamn alien. He's tiny and petite and miniscule. So he's fey? Alienoid? What the fuck is wrong with her? I'm getting strong vibes of Merry's like little guy that clings to her but is really a full-grown adult. STOP IT. We get it, he's effeminate and short. DEAL.
3. Unofficial uniform? I just imagined the jumpsuit of people working in a garage on cars. Great.
4. I wonder if Asher and JC have been fucking this whole time? That'd be amazingly hilarious.
5. Maybe Asher will be fine if JC just buttfucks him more often? Or he can just go sporfle off with Narci. I'm still okay with this headcanon. He and Narci are defecting.
6. So basically the second one has hazel eyes, with hints of blue and brown, and the differences in lighting/colors of clothes will bring out stronger hues of each color. Which is a really neat thing and I wish I had hazel eyes. Oh God, a realistic eye color-changing man. I have a feelings he wants this one. Please tell me I'm wrong?
7. FUCK. FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK. Of course she wants that one.
8. Mephy, please forever keep that look. FOREVER KEEP THAT LOOK AND FIGHT THE DOOMCROTCH PLEASE.
9. HOLY IMPUDENT SHIT, WOMAN. These are the best of the.... I CANNOT. MY RAGE. I NEED PHYSICAL RESTRAINING TO KEEP FROM DESTROYING THIS SHITHEAD MAIN CHARACTER.
10. MEPHY YOU ARE ON MY NEW FAVORITE PERSON LIST. ARROGANT TO PISSED OFF. OH MY GOD I LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE <3
11. I would like to request Mephistopheles as a blind date, and potential joining member of my tiny harem with Shang-Da. Because he's got an amazing attitude, stood up to Anita, and sounds sexy as hell. Even if his golden skin sounds kind of weird, but I blame LKH for making it sound like these guys are literally covered in gold leaf. I'll leave it entirely up to him if he wants to join for permanence, though. But I'm definitely stealing him from the Doomcrotch immediately to spare him the atrocities.
12. ... DID SHE REALLY JUST SAY SHE'S A BIG BELIEVER IN CHOICES? REALLY? CAN WE ALL JUST TAKE AN AWKWARD MOMENT AND STARE POINTEDLY AT NICK, WHILE HE JUST LOOKS BLANDLY BACK AT US? BECAUSE I THINK THIS IS A GOOD POINT--NO, A PERFECTLY POIGNANT MOMENT--AT WHICH TO DO SO. ALSO WE SHOULD JUST LINE UP ALL THE OTHERS SHE'S DOOMCROTCHED IN TO SUBMISSION, AND RAPED, BECAUSE I'M NOT QUITE IN THE KNOW. BUT I'M SURE THERE'S MORE, EVEN IF NICK IS JUST THE MOST BLATANT. ALSO WE SHOULD POINT OUT JJ, JASON, AND BIANCA WHO HAVE LITERALLY BEEN STRIPPED OF THEIR CHOICES IN LOVE RIGHT NOW. FUCK THIS BOOK, FUCK ANITA.
13. Actually, I'm going to have their shaking their heads to it bothering them go back to Jake saying it's " a man thing" about the Brides having no free will not bothering men, but it bothering Anita "because she's a woman and women complicate things". And since they've learned no better than whatever Jake and whoever else has interacted with them have taught them, as well as their having no free will anyway, then yeah... it wouldn't bother them. Also, I think in part, that their having had no free will might make the concept of their having their own Bride with no free will at all except to want to make them happy seem sort of fascinating and like a dream. Like it's not something they can fathom, or achieve, so why would it bother them?
no subject
no subject
Two wolves and a tiger. So many big animals for a wererat to groom! XD
I feel like a weretiger and wererat would get in grooming "battles" and the two wolves would just sit there like "This is ridiculous..."/"Can we just pile on and cuddle yet?"
no subject
All the joy of a baby and none of the hassle of giving birth!
I feel like a weretiger and wererat would get in grooming "battles" and the two wolves would just sit there like "This is ridiculous..."/"Can we just pile on and cuddle yet?"
D'AWWWWWWWW
no subject
no subject
Roll for fire damage, because you just got BURNED.
Pride says no, Meph asks why that matters and "his arrogance went up a notch to almost angry."
Shows how little I think of this series when I find myself praising LKH for not making Pride the arrogant one. And for not going with the obvious 'Lust' tiger.
"but suspected that part of it was bravado. Bravado always hides fear, or at least uncertainty."
OH REALLY ANITA. I think this is the closest she'll come to admitting that she's a really insecure person.
"And I'm going to be talking to him about that earlier."
Did the doomcrotch give her time traveling powers? Is it a TADIS? Is... is she bigger on the inside?
no subject
They'd be adorable.
no subject
no subject
no subject
And god yes, thank heavens for no Lust tiger
no subject
The golden tigers are basically white Asians. She gives them yellow/golden skin...but not too yellow and notices how she compares it to a tan rather than actual Asian skin colors (though the only Asians who appear in the series are bone-white, LKH doesn't seem to understand that not all Asians literally look like china dolls). The tigers also retain Caucasian features...so white Asians, white enough that Anita can bang them with just a hint of exotic 'flavoring' so she can pat herself on the back for being progressive.
The man with straight hair and blue hazel eyes says his name is Mephistopheles.
I cannot take this name seriously. Every time I hear it, I think:
Or
no subject
no subject
CAN'T BREATHE
DYING
no subject
"Fuck me while I'm tight!
"Magical Mr. Mephistopheles!"
no subject
"Pulled 7 kittens right out of
the Doomcrotcha hat~"no subject
Man, Anita is a douche.
Given how they seem to have been raised, I'm going to give them a pass on that. After all, their free wills have never mattered so far in this story, have probably never mattered in their entire lives, so why should they see the free will of other wereanimals-enslaved-to-a-vampire-or-close as mattering?
Yeah, agreed. I don't think particularly much of freedom, and that probably has very much to do with the fact that I've never really felt I had any any meaningful options to the things I've had to do. If I had literally been raised in slavery, I can only imagine I'd be even worse. "Take away someone's free will? Sure, why not? Everyone's basically enslaved to someone else, that's just how the world works, isn't it?"
no subject
no subject
And, of course, since Anita is not a decent human being, she sees no moral problems with this situation.
/"I had to fight the urge to ask him, What's wrong, boy? like he was Lassie or something." Oh you suck, woman./
Dear Lord, even Bella Swan wasn’t this condescending towards Jacob Black in his wolf form.
/She waits for him to smile at her/
Why the heck should he smile at you? You’re a sex-hungry monster who treats him and his comrades like they’re chattel to be bought and sold at a moment’s notice and you’re whining that he’s not happy about it? You’re upset that – horrors! – he’s not leaping for joy at the prospect of having sex with you? That he’s only doing this because “he has to,” according to the whims of your author, and not because he finds you irresistible?
/Isn't this woman nearly thirty? That's really immature. And she's boned guys named Requiem, Wicked, and Truth, so honestly these can't seem that bizarre to her./
And her author is the one who gave them these ridiculous names. Just because you lampshade how silly they are, Ms. Hamilton, doesn’t mean that they’re still not ridiculous.
/Look, these aren't just presents to you for your pleasure, okay?/
Of course they are. That’s what all of this is really about. The imminent doom and gloom are only excuses. That’s why Anita’s not acting as if this is serious. LKH only threw in a threat to justify Anita having sex with yet more people and behaving as if she was at a slave auction.
/"I sensed they they were arrogant and way too full of themselves"/
Says the person who’s laughing at them and insulting them for no reason.
/"I didn't like these men. I sure as hell didn't want to keep them permanently."/
KEEP THEM? What the heck are you talking about? You’ve just met them; they are complete strangers to you! I sure hope that you don’t KEEP them afterwards! I sure hope that after the pathetic excuse for your nymphomania passes, you’ll let these poor people go and move on with their lives. You don’t like them? Well, they sure as heck don’t like YOU and they sure as heck don’t want to stay with you permanently, you complete monster.
/Yes, she really used four Os for that./
This is a grown woman speaking? She’s about as mature as a green banana.
/Anita claims that "I'm a big believer in choices"/
Liar.
/she claims "I really don't like to force people to do anything."/
LIAR.
/Anita says it means that "taking someone's free will away forever seems sort of evil to me. I'd rather not do it again."/
LIAR!
/Anita says "Self-preservation, or protecting the people I love."/
LIAR! LIAR! YOU ARE A LYING LIAR WHO LIES! *throws a Master Ball at Anita and summons Mewtwo, who promptly causes her head to explode with a psychic blast*
no subject
Yup. I think she does the lampshading because she thinks saying "I know it's dumb" will make it not dumb, but no, all it does is say that she knew it was dumb and put it in anyway.
SHE IS THE BIGGEST LIAR EVER I SWEAR
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
The indeterminate biological origin stains were all body fluids of a generally sexual nature until you added zombie bits.
Well, sexual nature, and therian goo, of course.
no subject