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SUE VS SUE
Oct. 23rd, 2013 12:28 pmBefore I start this story installment, let my relay another story: As I have mentioned, I volunteer at the animal shelter. This is part of Animal Control, which is a division of the police department, so technically I am a volunteer with the police department, and today there was a meeting for all volunteers regardless of what division they volunteered with, including shelter volunteers. Said meeting was overseen by a police officer who is the supervisor for us all.
Now, here's the odd thing: She was a woman! I thought those barely existed in the police department! What's more, she wasn't always just watching us volunteers, she's been a crime-stopping sort too, out in the field, in on action, all that stuff! And yet, she didn't look down on "desk jobs" at all, or prize shooting people/violence above everything else. In fact, she said that her real passion was teaching, and she loves doing stuff like "crime prevention" where she goes and talks to people about how to burglar-proof their house, etc. She did have a visible gun, but she wasn't constantly flaunting it, touching it, or talking about it, even though she mentioned she was also a firearms instructor. Isn't that weird? And she was neither overtly feminine (save a short ponytail and a touch of eye-liner) nor masculine! Bizarre! And get this, when the chief came in, he wasn't randomly hostile and misogynistic to her either! Do you think maybe she's "one of the guys" and thus worthy of respect despite her daring to have on a wee bit of makeup?
Okay, in all seriousness...one of the things that I got from the meeting was CD containing pretty much all the procedures and rules for actual officers, not just volunteers, on everything from how to handle a possible mentally ill person to family violence to how many earrings they're allowed. I got it for free as a volunteer, but according to her they sell them as well. She didn't mention how much, admittedly, but I doubt it's an exorbitant sum. I always figured that LKH getting some things wrong about law enforcement (not the more super outrageous stuff, but, say, stuff I sure wouldn't know without looking int it) was possibly forgivable, since I assumed that the specific information about every specific situation was not immediately accessible for civilians...so much for that. Granted, for all I know it's just my county that does this and everywhere near where she lives keeps their "blue books" under lock and key, but I doubt it. With all the research she claims to do, all the "real cops" she claims to talk to and be close friends with, all the stuff she claims to get right that eeeveryone else gets wrong, it is now that much more extra-grating to me that she clearly can't even be arsed to look at an actual book of police rules when it's not hard to get your hands on one at all and which could be kept very easily on her computer.
And now, two comments about this installment of Sue versus Sue:
1) Delilah's lines are from Tori Amos lyrics, because if you want to write a weird girl speaking cryptic word salad, there's no better source!
2) You will find out what Lucy did to Micah and Nathaniel, but I decided that putting the actual deed on-screen would detract from the overall humorous tone of the story. I don't want to brush her sadism under the rug by covering up the actual torture scenes, but this is ultimately supposed to be a funny story at heart, and while there is humor in what she ended up doing them, the painful process of how she did it is definitely Not Funny. I'm sure it could be if executed right, but my skill at pulling off black humor is not there yet.
( SUE VS SUE )
Now, here's the odd thing: She was a woman! I thought those barely existed in the police department! What's more, she wasn't always just watching us volunteers, she's been a crime-stopping sort too, out in the field, in on action, all that stuff! And yet, she didn't look down on "desk jobs" at all, or prize shooting people/violence above everything else. In fact, she said that her real passion was teaching, and she loves doing stuff like "crime prevention" where she goes and talks to people about how to burglar-proof their house, etc. She did have a visible gun, but she wasn't constantly flaunting it, touching it, or talking about it, even though she mentioned she was also a firearms instructor. Isn't that weird? And she was neither overtly feminine (save a short ponytail and a touch of eye-liner) nor masculine! Bizarre! And get this, when the chief came in, he wasn't randomly hostile and misogynistic to her either! Do you think maybe she's "one of the guys" and thus worthy of respect despite her daring to have on a wee bit of makeup?
Okay, in all seriousness...one of the things that I got from the meeting was CD containing pretty much all the procedures and rules for actual officers, not just volunteers, on everything from how to handle a possible mentally ill person to family violence to how many earrings they're allowed. I got it for free as a volunteer, but according to her they sell them as well. She didn't mention how much, admittedly, but I doubt it's an exorbitant sum. I always figured that LKH getting some things wrong about law enforcement (not the more super outrageous stuff, but, say, stuff I sure wouldn't know without looking int it) was possibly forgivable, since I assumed that the specific information about every specific situation was not immediately accessible for civilians...so much for that. Granted, for all I know it's just my county that does this and everywhere near where she lives keeps their "blue books" under lock and key, but I doubt it. With all the research she claims to do, all the "real cops" she claims to talk to and be close friends with, all the stuff she claims to get right that eeeveryone else gets wrong, it is now that much more extra-grating to me that she clearly can't even be arsed to look at an actual book of police rules when it's not hard to get your hands on one at all and which could be kept very easily on her computer.
And now, two comments about this installment of Sue versus Sue:
1) Delilah's lines are from Tori Amos lyrics, because if you want to write a weird girl speaking cryptic word salad, there's no better source!
2) You will find out what Lucy did to Micah and Nathaniel, but I decided that putting the actual deed on-screen would detract from the overall humorous tone of the story. I don't want to brush her sadism under the rug by covering up the actual torture scenes, but this is ultimately supposed to be a funny story at heart, and while there is humor in what she ended up doing them, the painful process of how she did it is definitely Not Funny. I'm sure it could be if executed right, but my skill at pulling off black humor is not there yet.
( SUE VS SUE )
