KISS THE DEAD, CHAPTER FORTY TWO

Tumors can sometimes have "blood pockets" in them. One of Sam's tumors does, and the blood inside died and started to rot. Luckily the blood pocket is located in the part of the tumor literally just under her skin, so I've been trying to soften that area up with some creams in hopes the blood will break through, because if it stays in there, it could go septic or necrotic and she'd die. Last night the blood pocket did just that, so the dead blood is out of there (though for all I know there are other blood pockets that I can't see because they're not as close to the skin) but unfortunately now there's a big hole in her and that might get infected and kill her anyway. So I'm just trying to keep the wound as clean as I can and hoping for the best, basically.

I REALLY LOVE RATS AND I COULD DEAL WITH THE SHORT LIFESPANS BUT THE TUMORS AND SHIT? THAT REALLY FUCKING GETS TO ME. I'm honestly glad at this point that I've made the decision not to get any more (unless it's taking one in that needs a home and has nowhere else to go) for an indefinite period of time (like, at least until I get my own place) because I'm just kind of at the end of my emotional rope right now for dealing with the health issues they just inevitably get because they're genetically programmed to be little cancer factories and not being able to do shit about it for them. I've had some folks say I've made them want to get rats, and believe me, I am all for making converts, but fact is they're also gonna tear your heart to pieces like this, be warned.

( KISS THE DEAD, CHAPTER FORTY TWO )