KISS THE DEAD, CHAPTER FORTY TWO
Mar. 26th, 2014 02:24 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
a_sporking_ratTumors can sometimes have "blood pockets" in them. One of Sam's tumors does, and the blood inside died and started to rot. Luckily the blood pocket is located in the part of the tumor literally just under her skin, so I've been trying to soften that area up with some creams in hopes the blood will break through, because if it stays in there, it could go septic or necrotic and she'd die. Last night the blood pocket did just that, so the dead blood is out of there (though for all I know there are other blood pockets that I can't see because they're not as close to the skin) but unfortunately now there's a big hole in her and that might get infected and kill her anyway. So I'm just trying to keep the wound as clean as I can and hoping for the best, basically.
I REALLY LOVE RATS AND I COULD DEAL WITH THE SHORT LIFESPANS BUT THE TUMORS AND SHIT? THAT REALLY FUCKING GETS TO ME. I'm honestly glad at this point that I've made the decision not to get any more (unless it's taking one in that needs a home and has nowhere else to go) for an indefinite period of time (like, at least until I get my own place) because I'm just kind of at the end of my emotional rope right now for dealing with the health issues they just inevitably get because they're genetically programmed to be little cancer factories and not being able to do shit about it for them. I've had some folks say I've made them want to get rats, and believe me, I am all for making converts, but fact is they're also gonna tear your heart to pieces like this, be warned.
KISS THE DEAD, CHAPTER FORTY TWO
"Dev hadn't touched a woman in two months" So...where were you? Again, Dev has been stated to be Anita's lover as well as Asher's and Asher didn't, if I'm recalling right, bar him from sex with Anita, so why hasn't he been with a woman that long? Is her sex schedule just that packed? "He wanted to touch, fondle, lick, and nibble all the parts that he'd been missing. Who was I to argue?" Um, the person to whom those parts belong? A human being who has the right to consent or not? This one little phrase ruins the entire thing for me. Not that I get turned on at all by LKH's sex scenes, but they don't make me uncomfortable if Anita is actively and enthusiastically consenting. This doesn't sound to me like someone who really wants to have sex, it sounds like "oh well, if he wants it, it's not my place to say no" Would it have been so bad to put in "And I wanted him to do just that" instead or something like that? Maybe it would have sounded innocuous in another work where consent wasn't routinely stomped all over.
"He brought me with his mouth, with me sitting above him" So sitting on his face. That's new, at least, Anita's always been on her back even for receiving oral before now. She claws around at the air a little because she's doing her usual trying-to-scratch-someone deal and can't and that's really funny to me. So Dev puts her on her back, fingers her, and then she claws his arm and is lying "boneless, breathless, eye-fluttering happy, when I felt the tip of him begin to touch me" and she says no, he asks what's wrong, she rolls over and looks for a condom in her pile of weapons...um, storing a condom with your weapons is a great way to poke holes in 'em, honey. "I'd started trying to carry some in one of my ammo containers." Oh lawd. Dev makes a "pouty face" and Anita smiles "Sorry, we aren't fluid-bonded." You can always tell whenever LKH has learned some spiffy new term, and I hate whoever taught her this one. Dev asks if she uses a condom "when you're with Asher without me?" Okay, so she does get with Dev, even if it's in three-ways with Asher, so again, why is Dev so lady-deprived? She says yes and "realized Jean-Claude had insisted on that. I wondered how long he'd been thinking Asher might have to leave." Buh...huh....what? YOUR LOGIC IS NOT EARTH LOGIC
Dev says that's fair, gets on his knees, and reaches for the condom. Anita grins and says that if he hasn't been with anyone but Asher for two months "then there's something else you've been missing, unless you changed your mind about enjoying pain with your oral sex." Wow, I think this is a callback to Bullet where they had a conversation about vampires giving head always hurting, and that shocks me because LKH REMEMBERING STUFF FROM PREVIOUS BOOKS?! Dev says that "Asher can open his mouth wide enough to avoid the fangs; just the sucking doesn't work." LKH can think of details like this, and yet look at all the fail going on with her worldbuilding. Anita says "Well, if you don't want oral" and hands him the condom and he says he didn't say that and lies back on the floor "hard and ready" and she starts licking around his groin and he begs for her to go down on me. Oh, no, wait, he begs that unfortunately-named wererat: "Please, God, just suck me." Anita says that "Some of the men in my life complain that I don't do enough preliminaries" and Dev promises he won't complain, she licks "the tip of him" and he begs more so she puts her mouth on his cock and "I liked the almost desperate look on his face" and she moves her mouth up and down "the long thick shaft of him" which causes "a look of both pleasure and pain crossed his face. It wasn't a good pain." So head from Anita isn't that great after all, apparently. She chalks it up to him feeling teased.
Anita talks a lot about giving head and it's too boring to even snark. The only noteworthy thing is when she mentions "doing what a vampire's delicate fangs wouldn't allow" SO THERE ASHER! SUCK IT! OH WAIT YOU CAN'T HAHA! Dev makes the usual "small eager noises" which is a phrase I am getting tired of, and tells her that if she keeps doing this he's going to cum (though he calls it "I'll go") and he wants to be fucking her cunt when he cums ("I want to be inside a different place I do that") Anita notes that they're on carpeting and asks who gets to be on top, Dev says he doesn't care and they can even switch positions if he lasts long enough. Anita agrees, and she gets on top, I REPEAT ANITA IS ON TOP FOR WHAT I THINK IS THE FIRST TIME IN THE ENTIRE SERIES OMG! Anita thinks how she is "tight, wet, but tight" and Dev says "Gods, I'd forgotten how tight you stay even wet." Okay, he said God singular earlier, now it's plural? And Ethan used the plural too, and again I wonder if the tigers have their own belief system and pantheon? I think that'd be cool/possible/probable. They're clearly their own culture, I think they'd have a religion that puts them at the focus rather than humans...of course, in this world, it's quite probable that the Bible contains therians and vampires too and give them a place, though it might not be favorable...hence why a culture of hereditary therians might have their own separate beliefs.
Anyway, "I sat on top of him with him buried inside me as deep as he could go, our bodies married more intimately than anything else could make us" Does anyone understand what that means? She whispers that it feels so good and he says "Dance for me." No, seriously. And so "I danced for him, finding a rhythm that rocked my body over and around his, and he began to push with his thighs, legs, abs, so that we got a lower body workout that no gym could offer." How do you push with your abs when you're fucking someone? And this just hit me, but shouldn't she be worried that what happened to Nicky might not happen to Dev? Yeah, Dev is a Therian Servant and not a Bride, but since exceptions to the rules and special shit happen ALL THE TIME to Anita, shouldn't it at least enter her head that it still could? It never does though. She gets an orgasm "between one dancing movement and another" and Dev tells her he won't last if she does that again so they should change positions to "Me on top. Couch." So they fuck on the couch and she cums again "writhing, shrieking, fingers digging into the red couch, as if holding on tight enough would remind me that I wasn't just boneless, wordless, warm pleasure." The way that she orgasms so easily and screams and thrashes around like crazy just paints a picture in my head that is more hilarious than anything.
He yells her name, starts going "faster, harder" and "my pleasure rode on the almost frantic shoving of his body into my mine. I screamed, and tried to move underneath him" But...he's already on top? He goes "fast and faster, deep and deeper, until he began to hit the end of me with every other stroke, not pounding but a tap" and then he goes all the way "burying as deep in me as he could" because he is a weremole and not a golden tiger at all I guess. They both come and scream a lot. He pulls out and collapses and "wrapped me in his shaking arms" while he sweats a lot and they spoon. He says he's missed girls and she says she noticed, which "made him give that low, masculine chuckle" and they fall asleep together there. Despite her being asleep she still manages to narrate though! She thinks about how "for me to forget we were in semipublic" wait has that ever bothered her ever? "and both of us to forget to clean up first, meant the sex was good" so every other time has been bad?" "and we were both tired." And then she specifies not tired as in just a lack of sleep but as in "too many things happening in too small a space of time" and "too much emotion". For me, it's been too much boredom, personally. "Dev and I slept all the bad away wrapped in a cocoon of flesh, and sex, and relief. As much as he loved Asher, he was never going to be able to give up women" OH THOSE BISEXUALS "and he knew that I would never ask him to give up men." Which has nothing to do with your faux-slash fetish, I'm sure.
"The sex was Dev's way of saying he was done with Asher" Hahahah, yeah, sure, whatever Anita. It was made pretty clear that he was just desperate for pussy is all. "In trying to keep the Devil to himself, Asher had made certain he wouldn't be able to keep him at all." Ugh, I really hate that nickname it sounds so dumb especially on someone who, as I said, really has no reason to have it. I mean, yes, Mephistopheles was the devil in the play but I mean as readers we have no reason to really see it as fitting him, you know? So it makes it come off dumb, especially with lines like these: "I slept in the Devil's arms and knew that for this Mephistopheles, the heaven of love had come at too heavy a price, and he was ready to come back to the purgatory of I-like-you-let's-fuck. It wasn't true love, but it wasn't exactly not-love either." Wow, I was about to say "at least she's not pretending she loves them anymore" but no she still kinda is, it's not not-love guys!
So I guess the next chapter is where they wake up stuck together by the condom, right?
I REALLY LOVE RATS AND I COULD DEAL WITH THE SHORT LIFESPANS BUT THE TUMORS AND SHIT? THAT REALLY FUCKING GETS TO ME. I'm honestly glad at this point that I've made the decision not to get any more (unless it's taking one in that needs a home and has nowhere else to go) for an indefinite period of time (like, at least until I get my own place) because I'm just kind of at the end of my emotional rope right now for dealing with the health issues they just inevitably get because they're genetically programmed to be little cancer factories and not being able to do shit about it for them. I've had some folks say I've made them want to get rats, and believe me, I am all for making converts, but fact is they're also gonna tear your heart to pieces like this, be warned.
KISS THE DEAD, CHAPTER FORTY TWO
"Dev hadn't touched a woman in two months" So...where were you? Again, Dev has been stated to be Anita's lover as well as Asher's and Asher didn't, if I'm recalling right, bar him from sex with Anita, so why hasn't he been with a woman that long? Is her sex schedule just that packed? "He wanted to touch, fondle, lick, and nibble all the parts that he'd been missing. Who was I to argue?" Um, the person to whom those parts belong? A human being who has the right to consent or not? This one little phrase ruins the entire thing for me. Not that I get turned on at all by LKH's sex scenes, but they don't make me uncomfortable if Anita is actively and enthusiastically consenting. This doesn't sound to me like someone who really wants to have sex, it sounds like "oh well, if he wants it, it's not my place to say no" Would it have been so bad to put in "And I wanted him to do just that" instead or something like that? Maybe it would have sounded innocuous in another work where consent wasn't routinely stomped all over.
"He brought me with his mouth, with me sitting above him" So sitting on his face. That's new, at least, Anita's always been on her back even for receiving oral before now. She claws around at the air a little because she's doing her usual trying-to-scratch-someone deal and can't and that's really funny to me. So Dev puts her on her back, fingers her, and then she claws his arm and is lying "boneless, breathless, eye-fluttering happy, when I felt the tip of him begin to touch me" and she says no, he asks what's wrong, she rolls over and looks for a condom in her pile of weapons...um, storing a condom with your weapons is a great way to poke holes in 'em, honey. "I'd started trying to carry some in one of my ammo containers." Oh lawd. Dev makes a "pouty face" and Anita smiles "Sorry, we aren't fluid-bonded." You can always tell whenever LKH has learned some spiffy new term, and I hate whoever taught her this one. Dev asks if she uses a condom "when you're with Asher without me?" Okay, so she does get with Dev, even if it's in three-ways with Asher, so again, why is Dev so lady-deprived? She says yes and "realized Jean-Claude had insisted on that. I wondered how long he'd been thinking Asher might have to leave." Buh...huh....what? YOUR LOGIC IS NOT EARTH LOGIC
Dev says that's fair, gets on his knees, and reaches for the condom. Anita grins and says that if he hasn't been with anyone but Asher for two months "then there's something else you've been missing, unless you changed your mind about enjoying pain with your oral sex." Wow, I think this is a callback to Bullet where they had a conversation about vampires giving head always hurting, and that shocks me because LKH REMEMBERING STUFF FROM PREVIOUS BOOKS?! Dev says that "Asher can open his mouth wide enough to avoid the fangs; just the sucking doesn't work." LKH can think of details like this, and yet look at all the fail going on with her worldbuilding. Anita says "Well, if you don't want oral" and hands him the condom and he says he didn't say that and lies back on the floor "hard and ready" and she starts licking around his groin and he begs for her to go down on me. Oh, no, wait, he begs that unfortunately-named wererat: "Please, God, just suck me." Anita says that "Some of the men in my life complain that I don't do enough preliminaries" and Dev promises he won't complain, she licks "the tip of him" and he begs more so she puts her mouth on his cock and "I liked the almost desperate look on his face" and she moves her mouth up and down "the long thick shaft of him" which causes "a look of both pleasure and pain crossed his face. It wasn't a good pain." So head from Anita isn't that great after all, apparently. She chalks it up to him feeling teased.
Anita talks a lot about giving head and it's too boring to even snark. The only noteworthy thing is when she mentions "doing what a vampire's delicate fangs wouldn't allow" SO THERE ASHER! SUCK IT! OH WAIT YOU CAN'T HAHA! Dev makes the usual "small eager noises" which is a phrase I am getting tired of, and tells her that if she keeps doing this he's going to cum (though he calls it "I'll go") and he wants to be fucking her cunt when he cums ("I want to be inside a different place I do that") Anita notes that they're on carpeting and asks who gets to be on top, Dev says he doesn't care and they can even switch positions if he lasts long enough. Anita agrees, and she gets on top, I REPEAT ANITA IS ON TOP FOR WHAT I THINK IS THE FIRST TIME IN THE ENTIRE SERIES OMG! Anita thinks how she is "tight, wet, but tight" and Dev says "Gods, I'd forgotten how tight you stay even wet." Okay, he said God singular earlier, now it's plural? And Ethan used the plural too, and again I wonder if the tigers have their own belief system and pantheon? I think that'd be cool/possible/probable. They're clearly their own culture, I think they'd have a religion that puts them at the focus rather than humans...of course, in this world, it's quite probable that the Bible contains therians and vampires too and give them a place, though it might not be favorable...hence why a culture of hereditary therians might have their own separate beliefs.
Anyway, "I sat on top of him with him buried inside me as deep as he could go, our bodies married more intimately than anything else could make us" Does anyone understand what that means? She whispers that it feels so good and he says "Dance for me." No, seriously. And so "I danced for him, finding a rhythm that rocked my body over and around his, and he began to push with his thighs, legs, abs, so that we got a lower body workout that no gym could offer." How do you push with your abs when you're fucking someone? And this just hit me, but shouldn't she be worried that what happened to Nicky might not happen to Dev? Yeah, Dev is a Therian Servant and not a Bride, but since exceptions to the rules and special shit happen ALL THE TIME to Anita, shouldn't it at least enter her head that it still could? It never does though. She gets an orgasm "between one dancing movement and another" and Dev tells her he won't last if she does that again so they should change positions to "Me on top. Couch." So they fuck on the couch and she cums again "writhing, shrieking, fingers digging into the red couch, as if holding on tight enough would remind me that I wasn't just boneless, wordless, warm pleasure." The way that she orgasms so easily and screams and thrashes around like crazy just paints a picture in my head that is more hilarious than anything.
He yells her name, starts going "faster, harder" and "my pleasure rode on the almost frantic shoving of his body into my mine. I screamed, and tried to move underneath him" But...he's already on top? He goes "fast and faster, deep and deeper, until he began to hit the end of me with every other stroke, not pounding but a tap" and then he goes all the way "burying as deep in me as he could" because he is a weremole and not a golden tiger at all I guess. They both come and scream a lot. He pulls out and collapses and "wrapped me in his shaking arms" while he sweats a lot and they spoon. He says he's missed girls and she says she noticed, which "made him give that low, masculine chuckle" and they fall asleep together there. Despite her being asleep she still manages to narrate though! She thinks about how "for me to forget we were in semipublic" wait has that ever bothered her ever? "and both of us to forget to clean up first, meant the sex was good" so every other time has been bad?" "and we were both tired." And then she specifies not tired as in just a lack of sleep but as in "too many things happening in too small a space of time" and "too much emotion". For me, it's been too much boredom, personally. "Dev and I slept all the bad away wrapped in a cocoon of flesh, and sex, and relief. As much as he loved Asher, he was never going to be able to give up women" OH THOSE BISEXUALS "and he knew that I would never ask him to give up men." Which has nothing to do with your faux-slash fetish, I'm sure.
"The sex was Dev's way of saying he was done with Asher" Hahahah, yeah, sure, whatever Anita. It was made pretty clear that he was just desperate for pussy is all. "In trying to keep the Devil to himself, Asher had made certain he wouldn't be able to keep him at all." Ugh, I really hate that nickname it sounds so dumb especially on someone who, as I said, really has no reason to have it. I mean, yes, Mephistopheles was the devil in the play but I mean as readers we have no reason to really see it as fitting him, you know? So it makes it come off dumb, especially with lines like these: "I slept in the Devil's arms and knew that for this Mephistopheles, the heaven of love had come at too heavy a price, and he was ready to come back to the purgatory of I-like-you-let's-fuck. It wasn't true love, but it wasn't exactly not-love either." Wow, I was about to say "at least she's not pretending she loves them anymore" but no she still kinda is, it's not not-love guys!
So I guess the next chapter is where they wake up stuck together by the condom, right?
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no subject
Date: 2014-03-26 06:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 02:07 am (UTC)Maybe this is why Dev switched to moaning "Gods"? Poor Godofredo probably threatened to go to the government with overwhelming evidence of the corruption in the therian and vampire societies if he had to run in on Anita-and-Co. screaming "GOD! GOD! OH GOD!" for the seventy-second time...
no subject
Date: 2014-03-26 09:13 pm (UTC)"I'd started trying to carry some in one of my ammo containers."
Oh for fuck's sake - hey genius, got any non-FMJ cartridges in there? Then you're getting lead dust all over the condom packet, and thus all over your junk. Where, I am told, it will absorb swiftly.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-26 09:39 pm (UTC)Dev hadn't touched a woman in two months
Two whole months! Wow, what horrible deprivation! This makes me think that once LKH started being sexually active, she never stopped for any period of time.
Dev says that's fair
Was he planning to refuse to use a condom and flat-out rape her if he didn't think it was? A person does not need an excuse for wanting their partner to use a condom. Ugh, this scene is gross.
She chalks it up to him feeling teased.
Feeling teased is "good pain." This is not the first time LKH has written as if a man not getting an orgasm right this second from a woman is a horrible and terrible thing.
Gods, I'd forgotten how tight you stay even wet.
Tight and wet are not mutually exclusive at all. I still have a hard time believing LKH has ever had sex.
our bodies married more intimately than anything else could make us" Does anyone understand what that means?
Yes. It means LKH thinks penetrative sex involving a penis is the only way to intimacy, and it's also a slap against marriage.
Dev tells her he won't last if she does that again so they should change positions
Every man I've ever been with lasts longer with the woman on top.
"Heaven of love" vs. "purgatory of I-like-you" is breaking my brain. I think it is an ultra-traditional way to look at sex, and shows that, for all her pretenses of being edgy, LKH's basic opinions have not changed. Fucking someone just because you like them is not a "purgatory", and it's not lesser than romantic love. It's a different kind of relationship.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-26 10:24 pm (UTC)"I want to be inside a different place"
LKH is just incapable of writing dirty talk, isn't she? LKH, your readers are not going to have a fit of the vapours if one of your characters says pussy or cunt while having sex.
"Dance for me."
That is creepy. There's a short online game called Loved which is... hard to describe, really, but it's sort of an allegory about an abusive relationship. Every so often in it you get asked questions, and one of them was Do I own your body or your mind? And if you chose body, the response was Dance for me.
I know there's no way that was an intentional reference from LKH, it's just... creepy.
The cocoon of flesh thing reminds me of body horror things in the Merry Gentry series. Not what LKH was going for, I hope.
"In trying to keep the Devil to himself, Asher had made certain he wouldn't be able to keep him at all."
Hmm. Something about that pings me as her putting her faults on Asher, but I can't tell what or why.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 02:03 am (UTC)Because Anita is now ~poly~, she allows her men to get with bit characters. This keeps everyone happy, as opposed to mean old Asher, who won't let his man be with anyone else... you know, a lot like ANITA DID RIGHT UP TO BULLET...
LKH is just incapable of writing dirty talk, isn't she? LKH, your readers are not going to have a fit of the vapours if one of your characters says pussy or cunt while having sex.
Considering that her inimitable prose ends up turning men into weremoles at orgasm, I think SHE'LL have a fit of the vapours. When has she ever shown any consideration for the readers?! Last time she pretended to have any concern for her fanbase, we got Shutdown!
no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 02:14 am (UTC)Is her sex schedule just that packed?
Nah, we just had accidental confirmation that no one exists when LKH isn't thinking of them. She wasn't thinking about Dev when he was Asher's boytoy, so he didn't get any girlsex.
Um, the person to whom those parts belong? A human being who has the right to consent or not?
You know, I think LKH has a kink for people being objectified and used.
That would be one thing if it was something she clearly distinguished as fantasy or something that was made clear as a pre-arranged consensual scenario, but noooope.
"I'd started trying to carry some in one of my ammo containers." Oh lawd.
Bringing a whole new meaning to 'firing your weapon'.
Oh, no, wait, he begs that unfortunately-named wererat: "Please, God, just suck me."
Godofredo is within his rights to sue them all blind for sexual harassment. After all, he hears Anita screaming for him to fuck her - "OH GOD, OH GOD, FUCK ME. GOD!" - every night, and he's not even redshirted.
I wonder if the tigers have their own belief system and pantheon? I think that'd be cool/possible/probable. They're clearly their own culture, I think they'd have a religion that puts them at the focus rather than humans...of course, in this world, it's quite probable that the Bible contains therians and vampires too and give them a place, though it might not be favorable...hence why a culture of hereditary therians might have their own separate beliefs.
I seem to remember Anita mentioning this at some point... in a smug way, but still. Yes, it's canon that the tigers have some sort of belief system going back to when the first emperor of China forced them to go underground.
he goes all the way "burying as deep in me as he could" because he is a weremole and not a golden tiger at all I guess.
You owe me brain bleach. D|
"and he knew that I would never ask him to give up men." Which has nothing to do with your faux-slash fetish, I'm sure.
Bwahaha. Yes.
So I guess the next chapter is where they wake up stuck together by the condom, right?
YEEEEEUP. Fun, right? :D
no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 03:20 am (UTC)I've realized on reading your comment how specific that phrasing is. She doesn't say she'll never ask Dev to give up other people. Just men. Wonder what her response would be if he tried to get with the werelioness now that Anita's officially really truly fucking him.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 05:35 pm (UTC)YOU CANNOT NARRATE WHEN THE CHARACTER THAT YOU ARE WRITING THROUGH IS ASLEEP
no subject
Date: 2014-03-27 05:53 pm (UTC)"I danced for him, finding a rhythm that rocked my body over and around his
Oh this gem's resurfaced. Anita "danced" for JC when they were screwing in the tub in Beauty and then it got super weird, partly because she described the dancing as being like a marionette jerking around on strings, and partly because she could watch them both in the mirror(s) and described her expression as one of pain as she was screaming in his arms. That right there is like the opposite of sexy. I get that some people make hilarious and weird sex-faces, but like...there's a difference between that and basically describing yourself as being in a horror movie.
Also I wanna know just what kinda dancing she even does. White Person Shuffle = eternally bad.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-28 05:20 am (UTC)1. So he's basically just all over the squishiest parts of the tits, and the vagina, then? Because those are literally the only parts on a female that a man doesn't have. And I'm being generous with the tits; overweight men can have those, too.
2. That sounds like Mephisto carried her with his mouth. He carried her by the vagina with his mouth. I am having odd thoughts of a mama cat now.
3. Wait, so... if Anita didn't use a condom with Asher when it was just them, or with him and JC, it wouldn't be fair? WHAT LOGIC IS THAT, MEPHISTO?
Wander: *steps out of convenient crevice and Gibbs' smacks him*
4. That was the least unsexy transition to "Oh, you're gonna give me head instead? Awesome!" of him just saying that and laying back.
5. WHY DOES HE LOOKED PAINED. I DON'T THINK IT SHOULD HURT. Unless her mouth is literally over stimulating the head of his penis that much. Does she have little ganglia in her mouth/throat to do that? OH MY GOD SHE REALLY IS AN ALIEN!
And I just made this tentacle porn. Me: 1; LKH: 06. Whoa, wait. So did he put the condom on before the blowjob? Or did Anita just up and forget to fucking do that now?
7. Does getting wet make people stop being tight? IS THAT A LEGIT THING? I'm actually being serious. I'm... so confused. I just assumed being wet meant it wouldn't be as "OH GOD THAT'S LIKE SANDPAPER GET IT OUT RIGHT NOW" as it would be dry.
8. So is his dick like... up through the cervix and into her uterus? Symbolizing the wedding band around the finger? WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH MARRIAGE? SEX AND MARRIAGE ARE NOT THE SAME. And now I want a cartoon of random body parts getting married and being offended by the hipster!genitals always outshining them with their ~*marriage*~.
9. I think she means that he's lifting his thighs up and using his abs to help stabilize. Like it's a core work-out. I don't know why I'm thinking so hard on this.
10. Should it? It only happened to Nick because of the frequency. She hasn't fucked Mephisto yet already, so this is the first time. And she's not feeding from him, and he's not a Bride. Pretty sure JC and Asher said Belle only did it to her Brides. Plus it's LKH and she doesn't remember shit in her books unless it's USEFUL. And she wanted to be MAD at Asher even more. Hurting Mephisto now that Anita knows wouldn't help.
11. Shit, I wish I could come that easily. *pause to think* No, no I don't. I'd be unable to function. Clothes.
12. He's hitting her cervix? HE'S TAPPING ON HER CERVIX? IT'S NOT A DOOR! IT'S NOT A TELEGRAPH MACHINE! UNLESS IT'S SAYING "K-I-L-L Y-O-U-R-S-E-L-F. STOP." OR SOMETHING.
13. HE WENT TO SLEEP WITH THE CONDOM ON?!?!?!?!?!?!
14. Oh, really, Anita? Done with Asher, you say? *glancing pointedly at Affliction*
15. Mr. Mistoffelees was also a magical cat, who one evening pulled 7 kittens right out of a hat! I think this fits him much better than The Devil. Mephisto is clearly just a renegade from Cats.
16. Not-not love-love. A published author, ladies and gentlemen.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-29 02:00 am (UTC)I suppose you could wear a skirt and very loose underpants and hope no overly stiff breezes blew up there...
no subject
Date: 2014-03-30 03:04 pm (UTC)No.
no subject
Date: 2014-03-28 03:39 pm (UTC)THE BLOWJOB THING INFURIATES THE HELL OUT OF ME. Asher is more than old enough, in her universe (which has been mentioned in previous books but she neglected to remember THAT I see), to be able to hold his fangs back whenever he wants. There is literally no reason for him to be unable to do this besides LKH needing something else to make Anita seem so much better, nananana than Asher in every way, no matter if she breaks her own universe rules. Of course, Asher could be secretly doing this on purpose because of Dev being a mindslave or to give himself a reason to leave (which would be amazing and more interesting that any of this 'wah, I can't have women' shit), or he just doesn't care. EITHER OF THE LATTER TWO WOULD MAKE SO MUCH MORE SENSE. I rage at her and all of her useless, petty bullshit.
Why can't Asher come back with an army from his new city in the next book and raze this shithole to the ground?
Oh, wait, that would be PLOT and we can't have that here. >_<