BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART TWO
Jun. 15th, 2013 01:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
a_sporking_ratThings Sam did when I let her play on the counter the other night: Played with a bottle cap, got into my sister's bag of clothes, and went watermelon fishing, meaning she perched on the edge of a nearly-empty bowl of watermelon and did her best to get the very last piece at the bottom out. Once she did, she took two bites, let Blatz have the rest, and ran off for more mayhem to cause. Maybe she just didn't like watermelon, but I think it was actually just that she only wanted the challenge, not the fruit itself. She's definitely the little problem-solver of the bunch.
Ratsputin has had some bloody discharge from his penis (I SWEAR I NEVER INTENDED TO TALK THIS MUCH ABOUT RAT DONGS. OR TALK ABOUT THEM AT ALL REALLY.) and since my sister can't afford a vet for him right now, I've been treating him with cranberry juice and with leftover antibiotics from when Scurvy was sick. Given that he is otherwise totally healthy (acts normal, eats/drinks/poops normal, hasn't lost weight or had any other physical changes) I think this is probably just a UTI or bladder infection, rather than a sign of something serious like cancer, and thus a vet is likely not needed anyway, so I am not too worried about him/my sister is not a horrible pet owner for not taking him.
My sister has also promised to give me Darth Sidius, Ratsputin's former cagemate, in August when she moves. We're hoping that they can reunite, as she says Sid has been forlorn since they split up. This may seem odd, given that they were split up because they were beating the crap out of each other and Ratsputin was given to me to nurse back to health (I succeeded too well, this rat is a BEEFCAKE) because he was the one worse for the wear, but rats are complex. Just because Sid wanted to be dominant over Ratsputin doesn't mean he didn't want him around. While you get the odd solo soldier type, most rats need friends.
If they can't get along, though, Sid can always have play dates (supervised, of course) with Miss Blatz. Sam is scared of the boys since they're twice her size, but Blatz, weighing a good pound herself, is not fussed by them in the slightest and is happy to do nice friendly ratty things like licking, grooming, cuddling, etc. with them. I admit to being really amused at how she draws the line at mating, though. Any time one starts to try with some courtship behavior, she pretty much just sidesteps them. This will go on repeatedly at length and it's kind of hilarious.
Also, tomorrow I will be going with my family to Calloway Gardens Animal Safari! You drive through this park full of all kinds of exotic ungulates and such, and they run up to your car, and you get to feed them! They also have a small zoo too. It's one of my favorite things/places!
http://www.animalsafari.com/Georgia/
Then on Monday, I start my training to be a volunteer at the animal shelter! Too bad there's no shelter for the wereanimals in...
BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART TWO
The conversation topic then randomly jumps from Nicky to whether or not these two weretigers are related. Anita asks if they're brothers, they say cousins, she says there's a strong family resemblance. PROBABLY BECAUSE I BET THEY'RE INBRED AS HELL, ANITA.
Anita tells Jake that "They don't want to be charming and neither do I, so how do we do this?" Pride makes the brilliant suggestion of "Ask us?" and I guess Anita takes this as an attack because she says "Fine, you don't like me and I don't like you, apparently, but I'm supposed to find out how my inner tiger feels about yours, so how do you want to do this?" Pride says that Jake said Anita was blunt, Anita says "This isn't blunt, Pride, not yet." No, this is just pointlessly rude and hostile for no reason. Seriously, the weretigers have not said or done the slightest offensive thing. They just have expressions that Anita says look arrogant and didn't like her making fun of them over their names, being homeschooled, etc. And frankly, I reckon Anita thinks ANY expression is arrogant that isn't some simpering look of spineless submissive adoration and worship like I imagine Micah, Nathaniel, and Nicky wear all the time around her (and JC on occasion fakes). But since Anita's heinous attitude for some reason arouses admiration in others rather than contempt, Pride looks interested and says in that case he looks forward to seeing blunt and she smiles and says "You say that now." I actually agree with her here.
Anita hears voices from down the hallway. "Damian and Cardinal came in with her on his arm, very much the happy couple." I really, really hope they stay that way. I'm also glad to see they seem to still be together after the ardeur-orgy thing *glances at JJ and sighs because ugh I love f/f but NOT LIKE THIS PLZ* Cardinal is "talking excitedly with another woman who could only be the other weretiger." So Cardinal can be friends with other females. Yet another reason I like her better than you, Anita. This weretiger has a strong "family resemblance" to the other two, including blue and gold eyes like Meph, and "long yellow and white curls that spilled around her shoulders" THIS SOUNDS SO PRETTY I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT SHE USED THE WORD SPILLED (ESPECIALLY SINCE IT MAKES SENSE HERE). This is just SO GORGEOUS in my head, I love it, I want to draw her! "She was tall and curvy, and gave off a roll of energy when she saw me sitting there. There was emotion to it; it was fear; Why was she afraid of me?"
UH, THERE ARE A LOT OF REASONS SHE WOULD HAVE, ALL OF THEM VERY GOOD ONES. I'm sure I don't even need to make a list for you guys.
The weretiger lady says that the rooms are nice "but even her voice held a thread of nervousness." She's probably petrified at the idea of drawing any of Anita's notice to herself. JC says we're glad you like them and introduces her to Anita as Envy. Anita goes "Envy?", I made it a question" even though she's just met the other two with weird names along a theme that Envy seems to go with and she was already told by Micah that one of the other tigers was named Envy, probably because as a tall curvy blonde Anita is going to be jealous as hell over her no doubt. Anita notes that Pride and Envy are two of the deadly sins, Pride says yup, she asks if Envy is his sister, he says his cousin, Anita asks "The seven deadly sins and Mephistopheles. What's the theme for your clan names, selling your soul to the devil?"
Considering that they're going to be owned by you for the supposed good of the world, that actually sounds pretty apt. Hell, it even has a good historical basis too, considering that the golden tigers ran to Vittorio for protection from the MOAD, right? Still, no reason for Anita to continue to be a snarky ass to the guests. There is a difference between not being charming and just being a butt. She's being a butt, and pretty deliberately so. Pride explains that actually they're all named after characters in the play Dr. Faustus by Christopher Marlowe...okay, well, that's random as fuck, I think my theory was better. Anita notes that someone must be a serious Marlowe fan. UM, YES, DUH, OBVIOUSLY. Pride says that Jake's master is. Anita asks Jake if it couldn't be Shakespeare. Admittedly that would lend itself to a greater number/variety of names and more ordinary-but-still-pretty ones, but Anita seriously needs to just stop trying to be funny and get a move on with things. Jake says the guy prefers Marlowe. Meph asks if she's making fun of their names, Anits says "Trying hard not to, actually."
ANITA. WHY ARE YOU TRYING SO HARD TO MESS THIS UP wait a second maybe she actually is trying to mess this up. She's said how uncomfortable she is with this, but given the stakes it's not something she probably feels she can really refuse to do, so consciously she's going along with it, but unconsciously her nervousness and misgivings about it are rearing their head through this constant snark to drive the weretigers away from wanting anything to do with her. I could see this being the case, and I'm okay with it if it is. It's a lot more complex and realistic than just being like 'ok I don't wanna do this at all, it's really weird and repellant, but if I know I have to do it then mentally I can be totally okay with it' and I can only hope this is what LKH is going for. I don't think it's too unreasonable to believe she could be either, since it would be an attempt to show Anita as still something of a good person inside, or at least someone not totally depraved as she actually is.
Meph asks what's that supposed to mean, she asks what his girlfriends call them since "they can't call out Mephistopheles in the heat of passion, it's too long." Uh. Actually I'm sure they could. Oh God Oh God Oh God has around the same number of syllables and that gets cried out just fine by Anita during sex all the time. It's more like day to day life where I think a nickname would be needed, but of course Anita can only ever think of sex.
Meph blushes, this gives Anita an "awful idea" and she asks Jake "Please tell me they aren't virgins" because only a virgin would ever blush about being asked by a stranger what their lover calls them during sex. Jake tells her that's a question for them, she asks them, Pride says they're not, Meph doesn't seem to want to make eye contact with her, and now I'm the one with an awful idea because, well, sexual abuse is pretty rampant in vampire culture, and these guys were raised by the Harlequin, so...yeah. Anita observes that Meph seems "awfully uncomfortable" and then Meph stands up and "his power flowed through the room like someone had just turned on a hot bath" and informs her that "We're trained to meet the needs of every bloodline, and that includes Belle Morte."
Trained. That makes them sound like they've basically been cultured as concubines. All the squickiness there. Anita just asks if that means "trained in sex for Belle Morte. Combat for the Dragon. What did you train in for the Master of Beasts and the Lover of Death?"
THESE ARE TERRIBLE QUESTIONS. Firstly, you're likely to be dredging up some really traumatic stuff. Add that to the fact you're a stranger, and add that to you're the person who is supposed to own them next, which will include sex, and as people conditioned to simply satisfy the needs of their masters, that's sex that their actual consent to is very questionable. Secondly, remember how time is of the essence and you really need to make one of them yours as swiftly as possible? You're wasting a lot of time here, and in the worst way possible. Again, this could actually be her way of trying to avoid it, which I understand, but now it's being done at the expense of traumatized people. Picking on their names is one thing, bringing up their abuse and making them share it with you is another.
Meph says that they do combat for the Death-Lover too (he doesn't call him that, it's just shorter for me to type than Lover of Death or Morte D'Amour), and that "the Master of Beasts is weak. We knew no one in his line would ever come for us." Why not? His line may be weak but their one big power is over therians, which you are, and a very important line of therians at that. You'd think the beastmaster vamps in particular would come for the golden tigers. Also, on one hand, I sort of like that the beastmaster line is weak compared to the others, since controlling all animals/therians is such a really big power that things could be really uneven between them and other lines otherwise, but a friend pointed out to me that it's a little awkward that the only known non-white Council member is the one who was stated to be the weakest member and only got to be a Council member because of his animal-calling power, has a weak line, and whose name, unlike the Dragon or Belle Morte or Morte D'Amour, is a really ordinary human name that has nothing to do with his abilities (though that's the case with Mr. Oliver too...you know, the one who wasn't even a human but a hominid ancestor of humanity). I mean, come on, he's a Council member and he doesn't even get a fancy clan tiger for his Animal to Call when they've apparently got a whole secret cache of them? No offense to you, Gideon, I bet you're awesome, you'd just think he'd be entitled to one of the shinies...oh hell, I'm gonna go with the headcanon that Padma was offered a fancy clan tiger but picked Gideon instead because of his merits, not his blood.
Anyway, he also says that "the Earthmover never made enough vampires to be a bloodline that would come for us. The Traveller's bloodline is all but dead. He can't make more of his own bloodline unless he uses his original blody, and he won't do that. He won't risk it being destroyed."
Okay, this is interesting to me on a lot of points. Firstly, I had read on an AB Wiki that the Earthmover and Padma simply didn't have lines at all, which pissed me off for various reasons. However, that's not what Meph has said here at all. He's simply said that Padma-line vampires are apparently weak aside from their bloodline-power, while the Earthmover and Traveller line vampires are simply so rare that the golden tigers never had to worry about meeting and entertaining them, at least not so often they'd need to be trained in any way for it (I suspect this may be because LKH couldn't think of how such bloodlines would be catered to). But all three clearly do have bloodlines from this statement. Just ones that aren't large enough to "come for us" (Oliver and Traveller) or too weak (Padma) to come.
Secondly, why are Earthmover and Traveller lines so rare then? I've got a few ideas. Meph's explanation for the why the Traveller line is rare actually only raises more questions than it answers, because we know that it doesn't have to be the fountainhead themselves who turns someone in order for them to be that line. For instance, Gretchen was turned by Jean-Claude who was turned by Lisette, Valentina was turned by the pedophile master, etc. They weren't turned by Belle Morte personally, but someone simply in her line, and they're all Belle Morte vampires. So why then is the Traveller line near-gone just because the Traveller himself isn't making anymore personally? My guess is that something wiped out most of the Traveller vampires, so there just aren't many of them around to turn anyone themselves either. As for Earthmovers, I have a personal headcanon that while they are less common in general than the Dragon, Belle, and Rotters, it's only the ones who manifest bloodline powers that are super duper rare. Just me there; that's why of my four Earthmover-line vampires, only one has bloodline powers, even though two of the others are still Masters themselves too.
I'd also like to note this is the second time a Wiki has screwed me in relation to vampire books because SOMEONE missed a key detail in the phrasing and what that detail implies/means. Online it says that Akasha killed off all the vampires except the old ones and those Lestat cared for. Yet when I checked the book, here's what was actually said by Maharet: "Other than the Queen and the brat prince and my sister. Yes, we are the only ones left. Or the only ones left who count. Far off, there may be others--old ones who choose to remain apart. Or those she hunts still, who are doomed. But we are what remain in terms of destiny or decision. Or intent." So basically no, Akasha did NOT kill all the other vampires, she just killed the ones that mattered. Not to mention all the ones she was GOING to kill but never got around to because she's defeated before she can. Much like the Earthmover and Padma having lines after all, just not, respectively, large or powerful ones, this information makes all the difference in the world when it comes to fanfiction and original characters, which are a big thing for me. Edit fan Wikis carefully, folks, please!
Anita asks what about the MOAD, Pride says "She's not a bloodline. She's the enemy." Yeah, and she's also asleep and has been for ages, so why would they be concerned with entertaining her? Speaking of her not being a bloodline though, I played once at an AB RPG where someone apped a vampire/therian hyrid turned by MOAD herself. He could change into a cute black cat, among other epic Cute Sue fail. To be fair, MOAD has been shown to have personally changed a number of hybrid guards early on long ago, but they're all asleep with her in her underground castle, right? Or was one a member of the Harlequin? I never read the ones where they were brought up myself. Anyway, Anita asks "So really you guys have been training your whole lives for just three bloodlines: the Dragon, the Lover of Death, and Belle Morte." Yes, that's what they just explained. And I believe it's been stated these are the three currently most common bloodlines (even if rotters are rare in the USA) so that makes sense (and if it hasn't been stated before now, then it can at least be implied by this since rare bloodlines clearly don't come calling on the golden clan).
The three tigers are like yup, and she says that this "brings us back to our original problem: How do I find out if my tiger likes your tiger?" Uh I don't quite know how that works back to that, but Pride says "A kiss may do it, but sex may be necessary." OH OF COURSE THAT'S HOW. OF COURSE. "He said it as if he were talking about the difference between getting an inoculation or having surgery." He's talking about kissing vs sex with Anita, so that's understandable. Anita notes that since he doesn't seem thrilled about it they should just kiss. Meph asks "You don't want to have sex with us?" and Anita says that this is "a tricky question from a man" and tells them that they're handsome but "just seem to come with a lot of baggage." Well, yes, given their background, I think this is a given. Meph asks what baggage means, Anita says "You're angry just from this. I have my own anger issues; I don't need yours."
...angry JUST from this. Just from being pimped out, told your choice didn't matter, and that you had to become bonded to (read: mentally enslaved by) this hugely obnoxious stranger that seems determined to pick on everything about you she can and thinks it's fine to ask you about how you've been treated as nothing but an object to please and entertain others your entire life. Yeah, surely a person who was upset by that could ONLY be so if they had anger issues, right?
Understandably, Meph balls his hands into fists and "his power went up a level" which reminds me of Pokemon and/or DBZ. This makes Anita see her inner golden tiger "hiding in the shadows, her skin cream with stripes of yellow-gold." I think you mean her fur, Anita, not her skin. Anyway, Pride sniffs the air and notes that Anita doesn't smell like vampire. Well, she's not one, so of course not? Did she before, maybe? Envy adds that "She smells like us" and takes a few steps in from the doorway. No, Envy, don't get close to her, she's luring you in, but don't buy it! Meph gets in front of Anita. She thinks he's going to try to kiss her, but instead "his hand darted out in a movement so fast I wasn't sure what he was going for, but it wasn't a kiss" so she draws her gun and puts it to his chest. She tells him not not move. He tells her that, "No human, and few vampires, would have been able to see I was going for their gun, let alone gotten to it in time to turn it on me." I really, really want to call shenanigans on Anita being able to do it, but sadly it does make sense. Anita is a panwere, and she's demonstrated that she has therian abilities like super-smelling, suoer-strength, etc. And therians were stated in Skin Trade to be faster than vampires. So it follows that she would be too due to her own therian qualities. Sigh. But just because it makes sense doesn't make it SUE AS FUCK for her to have those powers in the first place with no cost, especially with him oohing and ahhing about it to her.
Anita tells him that "If you have a death wish, you're messing with the right girl." Isn't THAT the truth. He says that "We're supposed to make sure whatever vampires tries to possesses us is worthy of us." He sounds "a little afraid, but not really" which Anita thinks is because "he didn't believe I'd shoot him. I'd passed his test." Anita asks if there are any more tests she should know about so that she doesn't accidentally kill him, he asks if she doesn't "want us to prove that we're worthy of you?" Uh, wait, I thought the tests were for the opposite purpose, proving Anita is worthy of them? Anita tells him to hold that thought, then backs away from him. She starts to (gasp!) take off her weapons and says "If we end up killing these guys" royal 'we' there I suppose, Anita? "let's not make it because we had a cultural misunderstanding." Micah asks what she means (I need to start counting how many times people say that) and Anita says that "He really believes I want him to prove he's a warrior. He really believes that I need to prove myself worthy of him." How dare he! Anita is worthy of all the men ever, and more than that she is entitled! "It's like they've been raised in a culture that I don't understand."
UM, THEY WERE. THAT HAS BEEN MADE QUITE CLEAR. RAISED BY HARLEQUIN, HOMESCHOOLED, BRED LIKE FARM ANIMALS, TRAINED LIKE SEX SLAVES, ETC. I WOULD DEFINITELY CALL THAT A DIFFERENT CULTURE, TO SAY THE LEAST. Okay maybe culture isn't the right world, more like an abusive cult, but yeah.
She divides her weapons between Micah and Nathaniel, then goes back over to Meph and Pride. She asks if they're "done with the warrior stuff", they look at each other, Pride says that if she were male (if? Anita is the manliest man of all men!) then they' likely do hand-to-hand combat but since they're bigger he says she won't win. I don't know much about martial arts, but isn't part of it enabling a person to take down opponents much bigger than they are? I think I heard that somewhere. And Pride seems to have read my mind because he continues that "It's not about training. It's about size, and you can't help that you're small. We won't hold that against you." Anita says she feels like she is "missing something" (a conscience, maybe? A sense of empathy? Any sense at all?) but all she asks is "Who's up first?" and they ask what and she says, "A kiss, who's first?" Priorities, this one. Well, no, wait, that was unfair of me, that actually is the correct priority in terms of the plot, and I'm the one who's been urging her to get on with it already.
They look at each other again. I have no idea why, but Pride says, "When we go to the human clubs, the women are a little more eager." Um, what about Anita asking who's first for a kiss doesn't say eager to you? I feel like she could rip off her clothes, spread her legs open, and yell COME 'N' GET IT and there would still be comments about how other women are so much sluttier than she is (and yet also don't enjoy sex like she does, go figure). Anita points behind her and says that "They're my guys. It's not that you aren't cute" she's said that at least twice now "but when this is already waiting at home" so remember when Monica was chewed out for calling Nathaniel an 'it'? It's okay if he's a 'this'! "it makes a girl a little less eager to add new men." Again, this has fuck all to do with what you want, Anita. World at stake here, remember? All you have to do is fuck a few sexy supernatural guys like you do every book. Forgive me if I have a hard time sympathizing with your plight.
They look at each other AGAIN and Pride says that seems reasonable and Anita thinks that "reasonable" is an "interesting choice of words" probably because it's a word she doesn't know the meaning of, and asks again who kisses her first. Instead of, I don't know, rock paper scissors or something, Pride tells her to see who smells the best. Anita says this a normal wereanimal thing and since she doesn't have any other ideas she'll go with it. The guys take off their shirts and we are reminded how ~tiny~ she is with the note that "my head came to just below Pride's pectoral muscles and little lower down the ribs on Mephistopheles." Pride said earlier when talking about her being smaller than them that they were each around seven inches taller than Anita. Since she's 5'3, that puts them at 5'10, the average American male height, so they're not in fact remarkably tall as that passage might suggest (at least it did to me). Whether it's accurate on where her head would hit on them, I don't know, I'm really awful with visualizing heights and weights and such. A friend told me that they'd have to be more around 6'9 for her head to only go that high, though.
Anita thinks to herself that you'd think she'd get used to hot "muscled half-nakedness" like this and then they move towards her and she puts her hands on them to stop them from sandwiching her and the last words of the chapter are that "It was a mistake to touch them. But it was like so many mistakes; it looks harmless until you do it, and then it's too late."
Anita, you know perfectly well that you touching wereanimals, especially hot male ones of a species that corresponds to any of your inner zoo, especially those beasts in you that lack a mate/slave of their species, is a big mistake. That was a huge point in Flirt.
Also, I would like to note that Envy was among the tigers picked for Anita, yet she's not in on this at all. She's not even being considered by Anita despite the fact Anita said that adding a girl was fine and that she really isn't eager for more men anyway. If having a new man in the harem is indeed going to be such a drag for her because of the extra emotional input (as if she gives any anyway) and scheduling him in for his share of sex, etc., why not just get a girl that she won't want to do these things with anyway? It's been made very clear that vampires can have an Animal to Call without it being a sexual thing. Sure, Anita's way of making them hers to call involves sex, so she and Envy could just screw this one time, then pretty much let Envy do whatever (and whoever) the fuck she wants and just help Anita out with the fighting-the-MOAD shit. But no, despite the fact that this would supposedly be exactly what Anita wants and more men is what she doesn't want, Envy is being ignored while Anita is in a hottie-sandwich that I sense is about to turn to sexings.
The fact that Envy is drawing as little attention to herself as possible makes me think that she doesn't want anything to do with Anita herself, and this makes her the smartest of the lot so far, so I guess I can't be displeased with her thankfully being spared from becoming Anita's latest slave, sexual or not. Go hang with Cardinal now that things are heating up, Envy, shield your eyes! Come to think of it, I'm now imagining Cardinal, JJ, Bianca, and Envy all in some cute little girls club thing. They could be called The Bullet Babes or something! Maybe Kelly and Rosamund too, whom I also now (friend)ship as buddies with Claudia. Yes, I am going to pair all the minor characters off into little cliques. Like Narcissus and Melanie, who originally came together by over Anita killing their lovers but become true pals over shared fine tastes in fabulous shoes, cosmetics, and making men beg. You know you'd read that.
Ratsputin has had some bloody discharge from his penis (I SWEAR I NEVER INTENDED TO TALK THIS MUCH ABOUT RAT DONGS. OR TALK ABOUT THEM AT ALL REALLY.) and since my sister can't afford a vet for him right now, I've been treating him with cranberry juice and with leftover antibiotics from when Scurvy was sick. Given that he is otherwise totally healthy (acts normal, eats/drinks/poops normal, hasn't lost weight or had any other physical changes) I think this is probably just a UTI or bladder infection, rather than a sign of something serious like cancer, and thus a vet is likely not needed anyway, so I am not too worried about him/my sister is not a horrible pet owner for not taking him.
My sister has also promised to give me Darth Sidius, Ratsputin's former cagemate, in August when she moves. We're hoping that they can reunite, as she says Sid has been forlorn since they split up. This may seem odd, given that they were split up because they were beating the crap out of each other and Ratsputin was given to me to nurse back to health (I succeeded too well, this rat is a BEEFCAKE) because he was the one worse for the wear, but rats are complex. Just because Sid wanted to be dominant over Ratsputin doesn't mean he didn't want him around. While you get the odd solo soldier type, most rats need friends.
If they can't get along, though, Sid can always have play dates (supervised, of course) with Miss Blatz. Sam is scared of the boys since they're twice her size, but Blatz, weighing a good pound herself, is not fussed by them in the slightest and is happy to do nice friendly ratty things like licking, grooming, cuddling, etc. with them. I admit to being really amused at how she draws the line at mating, though. Any time one starts to try with some courtship behavior, she pretty much just sidesteps them. This will go on repeatedly at length and it's kind of hilarious.
Also, tomorrow I will be going with my family to Calloway Gardens Animal Safari! You drive through this park full of all kinds of exotic ungulates and such, and they run up to your car, and you get to feed them! They also have a small zoo too. It's one of my favorite things/places!
http://www.animalsafari.com/Georgia/
Then on Monday, I start my training to be a volunteer at the animal shelter! Too bad there's no shelter for the wereanimals in...
BULLET, CHAPTER 39, PART TWO
The conversation topic then randomly jumps from Nicky to whether or not these two weretigers are related. Anita asks if they're brothers, they say cousins, she says there's a strong family resemblance. PROBABLY BECAUSE I BET THEY'RE INBRED AS HELL, ANITA.
Anita tells Jake that "They don't want to be charming and neither do I, so how do we do this?" Pride makes the brilliant suggestion of "Ask us?" and I guess Anita takes this as an attack because she says "Fine, you don't like me and I don't like you, apparently, but I'm supposed to find out how my inner tiger feels about yours, so how do you want to do this?" Pride says that Jake said Anita was blunt, Anita says "This isn't blunt, Pride, not yet." No, this is just pointlessly rude and hostile for no reason. Seriously, the weretigers have not said or done the slightest offensive thing. They just have expressions that Anita says look arrogant and didn't like her making fun of them over their names, being homeschooled, etc. And frankly, I reckon Anita thinks ANY expression is arrogant that isn't some simpering look of spineless submissive adoration and worship like I imagine Micah, Nathaniel, and Nicky wear all the time around her (and JC on occasion fakes). But since Anita's heinous attitude for some reason arouses admiration in others rather than contempt, Pride looks interested and says in that case he looks forward to seeing blunt and she smiles and says "You say that now." I actually agree with her here.
Anita hears voices from down the hallway. "Damian and Cardinal came in with her on his arm, very much the happy couple." I really, really hope they stay that way. I'm also glad to see they seem to still be together after the ardeur-orgy thing *glances at JJ and sighs because ugh I love f/f but NOT LIKE THIS PLZ* Cardinal is "talking excitedly with another woman who could only be the other weretiger." So Cardinal can be friends with other females. Yet another reason I like her better than you, Anita. This weretiger has a strong "family resemblance" to the other two, including blue and gold eyes like Meph, and "long yellow and white curls that spilled around her shoulders" THIS SOUNDS SO PRETTY I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT SHE USED THE WORD SPILLED (ESPECIALLY SINCE IT MAKES SENSE HERE). This is just SO GORGEOUS in my head, I love it, I want to draw her! "She was tall and curvy, and gave off a roll of energy when she saw me sitting there. There was emotion to it; it was fear; Why was she afraid of me?"
UH, THERE ARE A LOT OF REASONS SHE WOULD HAVE, ALL OF THEM VERY GOOD ONES. I'm sure I don't even need to make a list for you guys.
The weretiger lady says that the rooms are nice "but even her voice held a thread of nervousness." She's probably petrified at the idea of drawing any of Anita's notice to herself. JC says we're glad you like them and introduces her to Anita as Envy. Anita goes "Envy?", I made it a question" even though she's just met the other two with weird names along a theme that Envy seems to go with and she was already told by Micah that one of the other tigers was named Envy, probably because as a tall curvy blonde Anita is going to be jealous as hell over her no doubt. Anita notes that Pride and Envy are two of the deadly sins, Pride says yup, she asks if Envy is his sister, he says his cousin, Anita asks "The seven deadly sins and Mephistopheles. What's the theme for your clan names, selling your soul to the devil?"
Considering that they're going to be owned by you for the supposed good of the world, that actually sounds pretty apt. Hell, it even has a good historical basis too, considering that the golden tigers ran to Vittorio for protection from the MOAD, right? Still, no reason for Anita to continue to be a snarky ass to the guests. There is a difference between not being charming and just being a butt. She's being a butt, and pretty deliberately so. Pride explains that actually they're all named after characters in the play Dr. Faustus by Christopher Marlowe...okay, well, that's random as fuck, I think my theory was better. Anita notes that someone must be a serious Marlowe fan. UM, YES, DUH, OBVIOUSLY. Pride says that Jake's master is. Anita asks Jake if it couldn't be Shakespeare. Admittedly that would lend itself to a greater number/variety of names and more ordinary-but-still-pretty ones, but Anita seriously needs to just stop trying to be funny and get a move on with things. Jake says the guy prefers Marlowe. Meph asks if she's making fun of their names, Anits says "Trying hard not to, actually."
ANITA. WHY ARE YOU TRYING SO HARD TO MESS THIS UP wait a second maybe she actually is trying to mess this up. She's said how uncomfortable she is with this, but given the stakes it's not something she probably feels she can really refuse to do, so consciously she's going along with it, but unconsciously her nervousness and misgivings about it are rearing their head through this constant snark to drive the weretigers away from wanting anything to do with her. I could see this being the case, and I'm okay with it if it is. It's a lot more complex and realistic than just being like 'ok I don't wanna do this at all, it's really weird and repellant, but if I know I have to do it then mentally I can be totally okay with it' and I can only hope this is what LKH is going for. I don't think it's too unreasonable to believe she could be either, since it would be an attempt to show Anita as still something of a good person inside, or at least someone not totally depraved as she actually is.
Meph asks what's that supposed to mean, she asks what his girlfriends call them since "they can't call out Mephistopheles in the heat of passion, it's too long." Uh. Actually I'm sure they could. Oh God Oh God Oh God has around the same number of syllables and that gets cried out just fine by Anita during sex all the time. It's more like day to day life where I think a nickname would be needed, but of course Anita can only ever think of sex.
Meph blushes, this gives Anita an "awful idea" and she asks Jake "Please tell me they aren't virgins" because only a virgin would ever blush about being asked by a stranger what their lover calls them during sex. Jake tells her that's a question for them, she asks them, Pride says they're not, Meph doesn't seem to want to make eye contact with her, and now I'm the one with an awful idea because, well, sexual abuse is pretty rampant in vampire culture, and these guys were raised by the Harlequin, so...yeah. Anita observes that Meph seems "awfully uncomfortable" and then Meph stands up and "his power flowed through the room like someone had just turned on a hot bath" and informs her that "We're trained to meet the needs of every bloodline, and that includes Belle Morte."
Trained. That makes them sound like they've basically been cultured as concubines. All the squickiness there. Anita just asks if that means "trained in sex for Belle Morte. Combat for the Dragon. What did you train in for the Master of Beasts and the Lover of Death?"
THESE ARE TERRIBLE QUESTIONS. Firstly, you're likely to be dredging up some really traumatic stuff. Add that to the fact you're a stranger, and add that to you're the person who is supposed to own them next, which will include sex, and as people conditioned to simply satisfy the needs of their masters, that's sex that their actual consent to is very questionable. Secondly, remember how time is of the essence and you really need to make one of them yours as swiftly as possible? You're wasting a lot of time here, and in the worst way possible. Again, this could actually be her way of trying to avoid it, which I understand, but now it's being done at the expense of traumatized people. Picking on their names is one thing, bringing up their abuse and making them share it with you is another.
Meph says that they do combat for the Death-Lover too (he doesn't call him that, it's just shorter for me to type than Lover of Death or Morte D'Amour), and that "the Master of Beasts is weak. We knew no one in his line would ever come for us." Why not? His line may be weak but their one big power is over therians, which you are, and a very important line of therians at that. You'd think the beastmaster vamps in particular would come for the golden tigers. Also, on one hand, I sort of like that the beastmaster line is weak compared to the others, since controlling all animals/therians is such a really big power that things could be really uneven between them and other lines otherwise, but a friend pointed out to me that it's a little awkward that the only known non-white Council member is the one who was stated to be the weakest member and only got to be a Council member because of his animal-calling power, has a weak line, and whose name, unlike the Dragon or Belle Morte or Morte D'Amour, is a really ordinary human name that has nothing to do with his abilities (though that's the case with Mr. Oliver too...you know, the one who wasn't even a human but a hominid ancestor of humanity). I mean, come on, he's a Council member and he doesn't even get a fancy clan tiger for his Animal to Call when they've apparently got a whole secret cache of them? No offense to you, Gideon, I bet you're awesome, you'd just think he'd be entitled to one of the shinies...oh hell, I'm gonna go with the headcanon that Padma was offered a fancy clan tiger but picked Gideon instead because of his merits, not his blood.
Anyway, he also says that "the Earthmover never made enough vampires to be a bloodline that would come for us. The Traveller's bloodline is all but dead. He can't make more of his own bloodline unless he uses his original blody, and he won't do that. He won't risk it being destroyed."
Okay, this is interesting to me on a lot of points. Firstly, I had read on an AB Wiki that the Earthmover and Padma simply didn't have lines at all, which pissed me off for various reasons. However, that's not what Meph has said here at all. He's simply said that Padma-line vampires are apparently weak aside from their bloodline-power, while the Earthmover and Traveller line vampires are simply so rare that the golden tigers never had to worry about meeting and entertaining them, at least not so often they'd need to be trained in any way for it (I suspect this may be because LKH couldn't think of how such bloodlines would be catered to). But all three clearly do have bloodlines from this statement. Just ones that aren't large enough to "come for us" (Oliver and Traveller) or too weak (Padma) to come.
Secondly, why are Earthmover and Traveller lines so rare then? I've got a few ideas. Meph's explanation for the why the Traveller line is rare actually only raises more questions than it answers, because we know that it doesn't have to be the fountainhead themselves who turns someone in order for them to be that line. For instance, Gretchen was turned by Jean-Claude who was turned by Lisette, Valentina was turned by the pedophile master, etc. They weren't turned by Belle Morte personally, but someone simply in her line, and they're all Belle Morte vampires. So why then is the Traveller line near-gone just because the Traveller himself isn't making anymore personally? My guess is that something wiped out most of the Traveller vampires, so there just aren't many of them around to turn anyone themselves either. As for Earthmovers, I have a personal headcanon that while they are less common in general than the Dragon, Belle, and Rotters, it's only the ones who manifest bloodline powers that are super duper rare. Just me there; that's why of my four Earthmover-line vampires, only one has bloodline powers, even though two of the others are still Masters themselves too.
I'd also like to note this is the second time a Wiki has screwed me in relation to vampire books because SOMEONE missed a key detail in the phrasing and what that detail implies/means. Online it says that Akasha killed off all the vampires except the old ones and those Lestat cared for. Yet when I checked the book, here's what was actually said by Maharet: "Other than the Queen and the brat prince and my sister. Yes, we are the only ones left. Or the only ones left who count. Far off, there may be others--old ones who choose to remain apart. Or those she hunts still, who are doomed. But we are what remain in terms of destiny or decision. Or intent." So basically no, Akasha did NOT kill all the other vampires, she just killed the ones that mattered. Not to mention all the ones she was GOING to kill but never got around to because she's defeated before she can. Much like the Earthmover and Padma having lines after all, just not, respectively, large or powerful ones, this information makes all the difference in the world when it comes to fanfiction and original characters, which are a big thing for me. Edit fan Wikis carefully, folks, please!
Anita asks what about the MOAD, Pride says "She's not a bloodline. She's the enemy." Yeah, and she's also asleep and has been for ages, so why would they be concerned with entertaining her? Speaking of her not being a bloodline though, I played once at an AB RPG where someone apped a vampire/therian hyrid turned by MOAD herself. He could change into a cute black cat, among other epic Cute Sue fail. To be fair, MOAD has been shown to have personally changed a number of hybrid guards early on long ago, but they're all asleep with her in her underground castle, right? Or was one a member of the Harlequin? I never read the ones where they were brought up myself. Anyway, Anita asks "So really you guys have been training your whole lives for just three bloodlines: the Dragon, the Lover of Death, and Belle Morte." Yes, that's what they just explained. And I believe it's been stated these are the three currently most common bloodlines (even if rotters are rare in the USA) so that makes sense (and if it hasn't been stated before now, then it can at least be implied by this since rare bloodlines clearly don't come calling on the golden clan).
The three tigers are like yup, and she says that this "brings us back to our original problem: How do I find out if my tiger likes your tiger?" Uh I don't quite know how that works back to that, but Pride says "A kiss may do it, but sex may be necessary." OH OF COURSE THAT'S HOW. OF COURSE. "He said it as if he were talking about the difference between getting an inoculation or having surgery." He's talking about kissing vs sex with Anita, so that's understandable. Anita notes that since he doesn't seem thrilled about it they should just kiss. Meph asks "You don't want to have sex with us?" and Anita says that this is "a tricky question from a man" and tells them that they're handsome but "just seem to come with a lot of baggage." Well, yes, given their background, I think this is a given. Meph asks what baggage means, Anita says "You're angry just from this. I have my own anger issues; I don't need yours."
...angry JUST from this. Just from being pimped out, told your choice didn't matter, and that you had to become bonded to (read: mentally enslaved by) this hugely obnoxious stranger that seems determined to pick on everything about you she can and thinks it's fine to ask you about how you've been treated as nothing but an object to please and entertain others your entire life. Yeah, surely a person who was upset by that could ONLY be so if they had anger issues, right?
Understandably, Meph balls his hands into fists and "his power went up a level" which reminds me of Pokemon and/or DBZ. This makes Anita see her inner golden tiger "hiding in the shadows, her skin cream with stripes of yellow-gold." I think you mean her fur, Anita, not her skin. Anyway, Pride sniffs the air and notes that Anita doesn't smell like vampire. Well, she's not one, so of course not? Did she before, maybe? Envy adds that "She smells like us" and takes a few steps in from the doorway. No, Envy, don't get close to her, she's luring you in, but don't buy it! Meph gets in front of Anita. She thinks he's going to try to kiss her, but instead "his hand darted out in a movement so fast I wasn't sure what he was going for, but it wasn't a kiss" so she draws her gun and puts it to his chest. She tells him not not move. He tells her that, "No human, and few vampires, would have been able to see I was going for their gun, let alone gotten to it in time to turn it on me." I really, really want to call shenanigans on Anita being able to do it, but sadly it does make sense. Anita is a panwere, and she's demonstrated that she has therian abilities like super-smelling, suoer-strength, etc. And therians were stated in Skin Trade to be faster than vampires. So it follows that she would be too due to her own therian qualities. Sigh. But just because it makes sense doesn't make it SUE AS FUCK for her to have those powers in the first place with no cost, especially with him oohing and ahhing about it to her.
Anita tells him that "If you have a death wish, you're messing with the right girl." Isn't THAT the truth. He says that "We're supposed to make sure whatever vampires tries to possesses us is worthy of us." He sounds "a little afraid, but not really" which Anita thinks is because "he didn't believe I'd shoot him. I'd passed his test." Anita asks if there are any more tests she should know about so that she doesn't accidentally kill him, he asks if she doesn't "want us to prove that we're worthy of you?" Uh, wait, I thought the tests were for the opposite purpose, proving Anita is worthy of them? Anita tells him to hold that thought, then backs away from him. She starts to (gasp!) take off her weapons and says "If we end up killing these guys" royal 'we' there I suppose, Anita? "let's not make it because we had a cultural misunderstanding." Micah asks what she means (I need to start counting how many times people say that) and Anita says that "He really believes I want him to prove he's a warrior. He really believes that I need to prove myself worthy of him." How dare he! Anita is worthy of all the men ever, and more than that she is entitled! "It's like they've been raised in a culture that I don't understand."
UM, THEY WERE. THAT HAS BEEN MADE QUITE CLEAR. RAISED BY HARLEQUIN, HOMESCHOOLED, BRED LIKE FARM ANIMALS, TRAINED LIKE SEX SLAVES, ETC. I WOULD DEFINITELY CALL THAT A DIFFERENT CULTURE, TO SAY THE LEAST. Okay maybe culture isn't the right world, more like an abusive cult, but yeah.
She divides her weapons between Micah and Nathaniel, then goes back over to Meph and Pride. She asks if they're "done with the warrior stuff", they look at each other, Pride says that if she were male (if? Anita is the manliest man of all men!) then they' likely do hand-to-hand combat but since they're bigger he says she won't win. I don't know much about martial arts, but isn't part of it enabling a person to take down opponents much bigger than they are? I think I heard that somewhere. And Pride seems to have read my mind because he continues that "It's not about training. It's about size, and you can't help that you're small. We won't hold that against you." Anita says she feels like she is "missing something" (a conscience, maybe? A sense of empathy? Any sense at all?) but all she asks is "Who's up first?" and they ask what and she says, "A kiss, who's first?" Priorities, this one. Well, no, wait, that was unfair of me, that actually is the correct priority in terms of the plot, and I'm the one who's been urging her to get on with it already.
They look at each other again. I have no idea why, but Pride says, "When we go to the human clubs, the women are a little more eager." Um, what about Anita asking who's first for a kiss doesn't say eager to you? I feel like she could rip off her clothes, spread her legs open, and yell COME 'N' GET IT and there would still be comments about how other women are so much sluttier than she is (and yet also don't enjoy sex like she does, go figure). Anita points behind her and says that "They're my guys. It's not that you aren't cute" she's said that at least twice now "but when this is already waiting at home" so remember when Monica was chewed out for calling Nathaniel an 'it'? It's okay if he's a 'this'! "it makes a girl a little less eager to add new men." Again, this has fuck all to do with what you want, Anita. World at stake here, remember? All you have to do is fuck a few sexy supernatural guys like you do every book. Forgive me if I have a hard time sympathizing with your plight.
They look at each other AGAIN and Pride says that seems reasonable and Anita thinks that "reasonable" is an "interesting choice of words" probably because it's a word she doesn't know the meaning of, and asks again who kisses her first. Instead of, I don't know, rock paper scissors or something, Pride tells her to see who smells the best. Anita says this a normal wereanimal thing and since she doesn't have any other ideas she'll go with it. The guys take off their shirts and we are reminded how ~tiny~ she is with the note that "my head came to just below Pride's pectoral muscles and little lower down the ribs on Mephistopheles." Pride said earlier when talking about her being smaller than them that they were each around seven inches taller than Anita. Since she's 5'3, that puts them at 5'10, the average American male height, so they're not in fact remarkably tall as that passage might suggest (at least it did to me). Whether it's accurate on where her head would hit on them, I don't know, I'm really awful with visualizing heights and weights and such. A friend told me that they'd have to be more around 6'9 for her head to only go that high, though.
Anita thinks to herself that you'd think she'd get used to hot "muscled half-nakedness" like this and then they move towards her and she puts her hands on them to stop them from sandwiching her and the last words of the chapter are that "It was a mistake to touch them. But it was like so many mistakes; it looks harmless until you do it, and then it's too late."
Anita, you know perfectly well that you touching wereanimals, especially hot male ones of a species that corresponds to any of your inner zoo, especially those beasts in you that lack a mate/slave of their species, is a big mistake. That was a huge point in Flirt.
Also, I would like to note that Envy was among the tigers picked for Anita, yet she's not in on this at all. She's not even being considered by Anita despite the fact Anita said that adding a girl was fine and that she really isn't eager for more men anyway. If having a new man in the harem is indeed going to be such a drag for her because of the extra emotional input (as if she gives any anyway) and scheduling him in for his share of sex, etc., why not just get a girl that she won't want to do these things with anyway? It's been made very clear that vampires can have an Animal to Call without it being a sexual thing. Sure, Anita's way of making them hers to call involves sex, so she and Envy could just screw this one time, then pretty much let Envy do whatever (and whoever) the fuck she wants and just help Anita out with the fighting-the-MOAD shit. But no, despite the fact that this would supposedly be exactly what Anita wants and more men is what she doesn't want, Envy is being ignored while Anita is in a hottie-sandwich that I sense is about to turn to sexings.
The fact that Envy is drawing as little attention to herself as possible makes me think that she doesn't want anything to do with Anita herself, and this makes her the smartest of the lot so far, so I guess I can't be displeased with her thankfully being spared from becoming Anita's latest slave, sexual or not. Go hang with Cardinal now that things are heating up, Envy, shield your eyes! Come to think of it, I'm now imagining Cardinal, JJ, Bianca, and Envy all in some cute little girls club thing. They could be called The Bullet Babes or something! Maybe Kelly and Rosamund too, whom I also now (friend)ship as buddies with Claudia. Yes, I am going to pair all the minor characters off into little cliques. Like Narcissus and Melanie, who originally came together by over Anita killing their lovers but become true pals over shared fine tastes in fabulous shoes, cosmetics, and making men beg. You know you'd read that.
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Date: 2013-06-15 08:16 pm (UTC)And yeah. Yeah, screaming is probably the most appropriate reacton.
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Date: 2013-06-15 09:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-06-15 11:24 pm (UTC)Yes, in martial arts a smaller person can take down a bigger one. Supposedly LKH has studied some sort of martial arts, I highly doubt it given how inaccurate her 'fighting' information tends to be (maybe she took Tae Kwon Do or something...which would explain a lot).
Since she's 5'3
I think I spot a YAABI, earlier books put her height at 5'4. I think at one point she was 5'5. It could be she's shrinking, as LKH realized that 5'4 was still average for a woman, low average but average none-the-less. And average is simply not good enough for Anita. She must be the smallest most petite woman in the world with the biggest breasts and blackest hair and whitest skin.
It's interesting to note that Envy is yet another Vivian. Anita can only stand women who are victims, scared and helpless, and therefore don't pose any competition to her. Envy is another woman she can push around, another woman who is weaker and lesser than her, which makes Envy safe to add to her harem. You'll see this repeated with Jade.
It's kinda disturbing that Anita can only handle women as victims. Strong woman are depicted in several ways. Either too butch (Claudia), jealous of Anita's men (Ronnie), lesbian/bi (Sylvia and JJ), jealous of Anita in some fashion or super-bitch (most female cops and some female weres). Every strong capable woman has to have some crippling, negative trait that makes them less than Anita, something that removes them from this weird competition Anita has with all women. Weak women are automatically removed from the game, Anita doesn't have to compete with them, she simply feels sorry for them while at the same time she seems to hate them for being weak...while weak men are just super yummy to her. Weak men always have an excuse for why they are weak. Weak men deserve all of Anita's sympathy (as long as they are hot). Weak women are just sad and pathetic and it's oh so frustrating for Anita to have to put up with another weepy, weak-willed female.
It makes me believe that LKH thinks that women cannot be inherently strong without something being wrong with them. Either they are gay, sorta gay, or bitches. In LKH's world, women are usually and normally weak. Men are usually strong, so that when she does write a weak men, the weaknesses comes from some horrible tragedy in the man's background (normally rape). She expects weakness in a woman and expects women to be victims. Men are not usually victims, and so she treats them as sympathetic characters, rather then useless baggage like the women. And has anyone else noticed that the weak men are usually victimized by women? Belle Morte, Raina, Obsidian Butterfly; we have 'strong' women turning strong men into weak victims. Strong women usually end up as villains, strong women want to destroy all men. It's like LKH believes that bullshit about how feminism is this destructive and horrible force that has ruined families and tradition and men, because she depicts strong women as doing exactly that.
It's why Anita tries to distance herself from being a woman so much. LKH cannot see women as being strong, so she has to make Anita more like a man in order for her to be strong, while still being the 'good hero' of the story.
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Date: 2013-06-16 01:42 am (UTC)Yup, I have noticed allll of that regarding the treatment of women in this series. I really should have done a paper on it in college.
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Date: 2013-06-16 02:46 am (UTC)2. Um, how about everyone turns into a giant tiger and sniffs each other? Oh wait, Anita can't actually take on the form of her were species, BECAUSE SHE'S SUPER FUCKING LAME. Goddamn, what's the point of even being infected by all the strains if you're not going to get the cool benefit of TURNING INTO THEM ALL?!
3. OH MY GOD ANITA STOP BEING SUCH A CUNT ABOUT THEIR NAMES.
4. MEPHISTO--do you mind if I call you that?--I LOVE YOU, YOU ARE MY FAVOURITE. I WISH YOU DIDN'T GET DOOMCROTCHED :C. ANITA, STOP BEING A TWAT.
5. OH MY FUCKING GOD HE'S GOT THE SPINE TO STAND UP TO HER AND HE'S SHY TALKING ABOUT HIS SEXUAL PAST IN FRONT OF LADIES
CLEARLY NOT ANITA BUT ENVY IS IN THE ROOM AND MAYBE HE INCLUDES NATHANIEL SINCE HE LOOKS SO GIRLY WITH THAT RIDICULOUSLY LONG HAIR? THAT'S SO FUCKING ADORABLE I CANNOT. CANNOT YOU GUYS. HE'S ADORABLE I LOVE MEPHISTO <3<3<3<36. Obviously they became animal psychologists/snake charmers for Master of Beasts and killed people for Lover of Death, Anita. God, why are you so stupid?
7. I'm so glad I wasn't drinking. I'M SORRY, ANITA, DO THE GOLD TIGERS HAVE TOO MUCH FUCKING BAGGAGE FOR YOU, OH LADY OF BAGGAGE? BECAUSE WHEN DID YOU STOP WANTING MEN WITH BAGGAGE? I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT THE MORE EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE, THE BETTER. IT MAKES THEM EASIER TO TAME, CHAIN TO YOU, AND KEEP UNDER CONTROL. ALSO IT ISN'T LIKE YOU DON'T HAVE AN ENTIRE DEPARTMENT STORE FULL OF YOUR OWN FUCKING BAGGAGE SO I WOULDN'T BE TURNING YOUR NOSE UP AT THEIRS, LADY.
8. Not true. I'm 5'2 and my boyfriend is 6'2. When I hug him my face comes to like mid-sternum. That means Pride could be about 6'4, and Mephisto a little taller, maybe 6'6. Or around thereabouts. Granted, they're inbred, and who knows what genetic tampering the Harlequin has done. After all, Mephisto and Envy both have blue-and-gold eyes. Oh wait, hazel. My bad. I forgot LKH is retarded and can't remember eye colors.
9. When I looked at the Wiki, I always assumed it would be Mephisto's sister that would be handpicked as the girl. I guess it's for the best it wasn't, or he might be more offended she's being ignored. Envy is probably just glad no one is paying any attention to her outside Damien and Cardinal, who are quietly asking if she'd like to join a threesome later. (That's MY headcanon.)
10. I really hope her touching them doesn't mean 1) they start getting rolled, and 2) fight to the death of one. Because that will make me really pissed off.
--
On a side note, I had a lovely dream about Mephisto. He looked like a young Alexander Skarsgard. Mmm <3
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Date: 2013-06-16 12:48 pm (UTC)9. Yeah, I don't think LKH wanted to pick Envy as the girl since Envy was chosen by Micah, whereas Anita picked out little Jade for herself. Envy does get in a threeway though, it's just...not that one, sadly.
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Date: 2013-06-16 10:53 pm (UTC)9. Sadface. NOPE IT'S MY HEADCANON D: Micah's dong will break Envy.
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Also I feel like sharing my Mephisto dream. Apparently I was a new wererat in the Rodere and he took pity on me and started teaching me how to shoot which made Anita SO MAD OMG but he didn't really care. And there was rat/tiger snuggling. Also my wererat form looked exactly like a giant version of Samhain, teehee~
In exchange for shooting lessons, I taught him about being raised outside of the Harlequin cult thing. Which he found fascinating.
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Date: 2013-06-17 12:09 am (UTC)That would totally make Anita mad. I approve of making Anita mad (as long as it doesn't get you killed)
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Date: 2013-06-17 02:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-06-16 09:00 am (UTC)Oh Anita. "We need to connect with the gold tigers to save the world! I don't wanna have sex! Hello lady tiger who I wont have sex with, let me ignore you forever."
I feel like she could rip off her clothes, spread her legs open, and yell COME 'N' GET IT
I also picture a dinner bell. Or a gong to fit in with the appropriation of Eastern culture! That's better!
God. I hate how she displays her men like status trophies. "Look at what I fuck! This says something about me! LOOK HOW GREAT I AM!"
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Date: 2013-06-16 10:55 pm (UTC)Nope, a cow bell. Because cows = meat = food. And Anita's not cool enough for Asian cultured gongs.
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Date: 2013-06-16 10:06 am (UTC)I note the usual tone of passive-aggressive disdain for any other relationship than her own. Anita's relationships are REAL, even when she has so many lovers that she needs name tags to keep them apart - everyone else are just posers playing house. :P
Meph asks if she's making fun of their names, Anits says "Trying hard not to, actually."
Okay, we all know that the names LKH gives her vampires and werethingies are increasingly ridiculous and trying-too-hard-to-be-dramatic. But her giving people those names only to have Anita make fun of them just seems... odd. It's like she's making fun of her own... not kinks, exactly, but that's the best word I can come up with - the things that gives her a happy little thrill inside. So she gives characters dumb names because she likes them, and then she points out how dumb they are to show that she's of course not taking this stuff seriously.
Problem is, the absolute worst thing a writer can do is not take the idiotic things they write seriously. LKH's overblown-gothic porn-fest would be much more enjoyable if she just indulged herself completely and didn't try to insert sense or realism into it. It just draws attention to how stupid it all is.
And I believe it's been stated these are the three currently most common bloodlines (even if rotters are rare in the USA) so that makes sense
I am a little vague on the whole bloodline thing. So there are basically just the sexy vampires, the rotting vampires and the (for lack of a better term) fighty vampires?
... I suddenly realise that that is pretty much the White Court, the Black Court and the Red Court from the Dresden Files. Well, Jim Butcher has admitted that he pretty much set out to write LKH's books properly, I guess.
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Date: 2013-06-16 12:45 pm (UTC)Yeah, she may as well just embrace the dumb names. Having Anita point out they're stupid doesn't look wry or witty, it just makes the reader focus all the more on them being stupid instead of just moving on with the story.
So there are basically just the sexy vampires, the rotting vampires and the (for lack of a better term) fighty vampires?
Seems so. There have also been fear vampires but this section didn't give any indication of how rare or common they are. My guess is that they're rarer than sexy, rotting, and fightey types, but more common than the Traveller, Earthmover, and Padma types.
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Date: 2013-06-16 05:31 pm (UTC)Anita the narcissistic strikes again. Envy is being smart by getting as far away from Anita as she possibly can given her circumstances. I would bet that a lot of people around the Circus do that to the best of their abilities. It also wouldn't surprise me if a lot of therians and vampires and any other supernatural whatsits spend some time time deliberately underselling how effective they are at things so they don't bring the doomcrotch upon themselves.
I imagine that's how Cardinal makes it through the book and it has to be how Damien makes it without becoming completely mindwiped. There should be a support group that Damien carefully limits his involvement in because he doesn't want Anita to pick up on its existence from him.
Meph asks what's that supposed to mean, she asks what his girlfriends call them since "they can't call out Mephistopheles in the heat of passion, it's too long."
They don't get girlfriends because they don't get to have normal human relationships because they've been cult-raised to help whoever fight the MoaD. Sex might be something they have to do periodically, enjoying it at all is secondary. It seems like this is thrown in to once again dig at all other women who aren't Anita, since not everyone says their lover's name in the middle of sex.
Pride said earlier when talking about her being smaller than them that they were each around seven inches taller than Anita. Since she's 5'3, that puts them at 5'10, the average American male height, so they're not in fact remarkably tall as that passage might suggest (at least it did to me). Whether it's accurate on where her head would hit on them, I don't know, I'm really awful with visualizing heights and weights and such. A friend told me that they'd have to be more around 6'9 for her head to only go that high, though.
In addition to having tyrannosaur arms, Anita has no sense of proportion unless when referring to someone's genitals.
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Date: 2013-06-16 10:48 pm (UTC)I would join this bet.
They don't get girlfriends because they don't get to have normal human relationships because they've been cult-raised to help whoever fight the MoaD
Which Anita would consider if she had a single ounce of sensitivty
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Date: 2013-06-17 01:23 am (UTC)Note to LKH: making your character be needlessly rude and mocking towards people doesn’t make her look tough and cool. It makes her look like a petulant and obnoxious bully.
/Anita goes "Envy?", I made it a question"/
Ms. Hamilton, you put a question mark after the word, “Envy.” I really don’t think that the readers need to be reminded that it’s intended to be a question.
/Meph asks if she's making fun of their names, Anits says "Trying hard not to, actually."/
In other words, you are making fun of them. How am I supposed to take this woman seriously as an action heroine and leader when she’s so immature?
/because only a virgin would ever blush about being asked by a stranger what their lover calls them during sex./
Anita, just because you love to shove your sex life into everyone’s faces doesn’t mean that the rest of the world does. Maybe he’s blushing because this is an inappropriate question. Maybe he’s blushing because he – horrors! – likes to keep his sex life private. Or maybe he’s blushing in embarrassment on your behalf, for being such an immature and rude loser.
/OH OF COURSE THAT'S HOW./
Again, how is this not just porn dressed up as urban fantasy?
/Meph asks "You don't want to have sex with us?" and Anita says that this is "a tricky question from a man”/
Uh, why? Why is it a tricky question just because it’s coming from a man? Do you think that it’s any less tricky for a man to tell a woman why he doesn’t want to have sex with her? Or are you assuming that the essence of masculinity is wrapped up in a man’s sex life and thus if you deny him sex, you’re essentially emasculating him, whereas if a woman is denied sex, it either won’t bother her as much or she’ll just has to suck it up and take it?
/tells them that they're handsome but "just seem to come with a lot of baggage."/
*flatly* Oh, yes, because none of the members of your harem have any baggage. It’s not like your author delights in pointlessly giving them tragic pasts just so that she can justify their attraction to you and highlight how wonderful you are.
/so remember when Monica was chewed out for calling Nathaniel an 'it'? It's okay if he's a 'this'!/
And it’s okay if Anita gestures to her harem like they’re trophies.
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Date: 2013-06-17 01:30 am (UTC)Right? It's kind of hilarious in that respect.
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Date: 2013-06-18 01:47 pm (UTC)