BULLET, CHAPTER FORTY TWO

[a_sporking_rat]

Hey guys, sorry for the delay! In addition to cleaning the rat cages this weekend along with throwing myself back in job-searching, I've also resumed my gym and pilates routines, which I previously was on a break from for a few weeks because of shin splints. Not mention volunteering at the animal shelter! On Friday, I saw seven dogs get taken to their new forever homes, three more get put on hold for a pending adoption, and one get reclaimed by the owner who lost him! We’ve also got a guinea pig there right now and she is sooooo cute! It’s going to be hard for me not to take her home, honestly.

As for the rodents I already do have...

Justin and Jenner are both so old now that they are balding and are having problems with their back legs. I took their food and water out of the penthouse part of the their cage and put it on the ground floor so they wouldn't HAVE to climb, though they still do. Justin has a lump that I'm a little worried about, but Dad thinks it's a subcutaneous cyst, not a tumor.

I got a rat ball (no idea what happened to the old one) and Sam loves it! While the others are happy enough to be lazy lap rats, Sam is super high energy and wants to go everywhere. This way, she can, and I don't have to worry about it!

Jenner and Ratsputin, being alpha males extraordinaire, both freak out if I hold one outside the cage bars of the other. They're fine if one of the girls is out there, though, just interested. Today I tried the reverse, holding Ratsputin outside the bars of the girls cage. To my surprise, Blatz was...not aggressive, but pretty defensive. Every time he tried to put his nose or paws through, she'd get in his way and even try to nip. She's fine with them all outside the cage, very friendly and tolerant, so I guess this could just be a territory issue, but I think she was defending Sam, because she only started that once Sam went over to check Ratsputin out, and she kept blocking Sam and pushing her back every time she tried to get near Ratsputin. She treats Sam like her baby, and I think she was worried that this big intruding male might be coming to hurt her.

Also, someone got an advance copy of Affliction and is flogging/summarizing it on the Amazon forums, if you're interested!
http://www.amazon.com/Affliction-Book-Flog/forum/FxIH9VYIM8DKMA/Tx3UR91JCP7PJUI/1/ref=cm_cd_pg_pg1?_encoding=UTF8&asin=0425255700

Or you can enjoy this post, in which there is a summary of fifteen pages yet they don't get to the sex. It's not sexy buildup either. It's just a really, really boring load of nothing.

BULLET, CHAPTER FORTY TWO

"We started out doing something similar to what Jean-Claude and Richard had done, but we used the bed" because "I was shorter than Asher by a lot." So you'd think sex is happening right off the bat, right? Wrong!

Anita talks about being "cradled against Asher's body" and how his leather pants feel and how he's still dressed and Anita wants him undressed and how Meph's body type is a lot like Richard's ("tall, athletic, and physically imposing") which is what Asher especially likes "but the new guy was very interested in me. He didn't seem to mind the other men, and liked Micah, but he wasn't looking at the other men the way that Asher would have" I'm sure this has nothing to do with how Micah warped Meph's mind and desires so he'd be exactly your type of guy---tolerates other dudes in bed but ultimately only has eyes for you (and, of course, likes Micah so Micah can bone him too and won't have to worry about him as competition like with Haven.) She talks about how Asher "liked his women [sexually] knowledgeable, and his men knowledgeable with women, and he got off on being a man's first man" so Meph might be good at that too...no, Anita, I doubt that. He was trained to satisfy the vampires of Belle Morte's line sexually, remember? She doesn't only have female members, as you should well know. So anyway, Anita figures based on all this that Asher is going to hide his scars until he knows what his chances are with Meph.

I should add now that I had completely fucking forgotten that Asher was even in this scene. Look at the last spork, he didn't even talk or get mentioned in that chapter!

She wonders if it bothered Asher to see JC with Envy "showing such a strong preference for body parts he didn't have". Again, I doubt it. Asher has clearly always known JC leaned towards women as he leaned towards men, has had centuries to get adjusted to that, has enjoyed women with him, and even sought out a woman for him that they shared.

She and Micah get naked from the waist up, hug, and kiss with "gentle teeth"...this is the second time I can remember teeth being involved in kissing in these books. Kissing with teeth sounds unpleasant enough, but what does doing it gently mean? Rubbing your teeth together but not really hard? Meph asks where she wants him, and Anita admits that maybe for a moment they'd forgotten he was there. She says she doesn't know his comfort level, he asks about what, Anita looks at Asher whose expression is "absolutely arrogantly handsome." She used 'arrogant handsome" to describe the expressions of the tiger guys too; she knows that 'handsome' isn't something you can emote, right? She figures Asher is hiding what he's feeling because "he didn't want to spook the new guy." She then looks at Nathaniel, who is in a chair near the bed so he can watch, and he smiles. Then she looks at Micah, who tells Meph he can join in any time he wants. Meph smiles, climbs on the bed, and crawls towards them with "a sinuous roll" that is "graceful and lascivious, and promised sex like the air could promise rain" and Anita knows from this that he'll be really good in bed. I really have no experience with whether or not someone being graceful and sexy-moving makes them actually good at sex or not, so I can't say if this is bull or not, but I think it is.

He sniff her and rubs her and kisses her tits and stuff and "then he looked down at me and there was that heat that all men seem to have in their eyes somewhere" Do asexual men have this heat? And then he kisses her "all lips and tongue and teeth." Okay I guess I could see wereanimals getting teeth involved but it just seems AWKWARD AND MESSY not rough-sexy. He starts kneading her skin like a cat. I wish he'd also piss all over the place like a cat when he settles in and considers it his home, but un-sexy animal behaviors are never allowed. Since he kneaded her back he can feel there's a scar there and asks to see. She shows it to him and says she got it from a broken wooden stake. HE ASKS IF SHE FELL ON IT. THAT IS HILARIOUS. She says no, that a mind-controlled human tried to stake her. I LIKE HIS IDEA BETTER, IT'S REALLY FUNNY AND NONE OF THE CHARACTERS SEEM TO REALIZE IT. He says that "I've got one, and mine's bigger." Is this going to be a dick thing? He shows her the scar on his back "and it was longer, though mine was wider. Men, they're always more impressed with length than width." Yup, it's a dick thing.

She asks how he got it, he says his cousin Thorn did it in a practice match. They used real silver blades even for practice, he says, because "if you don't use silver, then you don't know how you'll react to being hurt." What? Since when do wereanimals not feel pain if the weapon isn't silver? They may be able to heal from everything non-silver and non-fire, yes, but that doesn't mean the wound doesn't still hurt when it's made. And it's been made clear it does in the past. Anita tries to read something in his expression as he tells her this, and Micah says that Thorn is one of the weretigers that didn't make his cut for who to introduce her to. Anita asks why, Micah says "He has a temper, and he tried treating me like I was short" YOU ARE SHORT ANITA NEVER SHUTS UP ABOUT IT I BET SHE PATS YOUR HEAD AND BABYTALKS ABOUT HOW TEENY TINY YOU ARE TO YOU and Anita says "Oh, so not winning points with me" and Micah says he told Jake that Thorn only gets to say if he doesn't cause problems, otherwise he gets thrown out. Since that's the rule with everyone I would think, I can only assume Micah told Jake this about Thorn especially because of the height thing. TREAT ME SHORT (whatever that means) AND YOU GET KICKED OUT TO BE PREY FOR THE MOAD AND HER HARLEQUINS. Nice.

The rest of the page and some of the next is spent with Anita showing Meph each and every one of her scars and telling him how she got them, just like she did with the SWAT guys in Skin Trade and the lion men in Flirt. LKH really has a thing for this. She finishes her show by saying how everyone that hurt her is dead now. Meph then asks to see Asher's scars. Asher goes still for a moment, then moves his hair, and Meph touches the scars on his face. Meph says his cousin Martino is going to be jealous, Anita asks about what, Meph says that "Martino thinks he's the most beautiful man ever, but he isn't even close to Asher. Or to Jean-Claude, for that matter, but you are the most beautiful man I've ever seen." Asher says that's not true and pulls away, Meph says the scars "barely cover any of your face, just this little part." and touches under Asher's lips.

1) Martino? Pride, Envy, Mephistopheles...and Martino?
2) Anita has the most prettiest men-toys in the world, everyone be jealous! If you're a woman, want them! If you're a man like Martino, want to be them! If you're joining like Meph, marvel at them and talk about how jealous everyone must be!
3) So, is getting a guy who thinks Asher is hot supposed to be a resolution to the stuff at the beginning? Because I don't see it. Meph may think Asher is lovely, but so does JC, and like JC, he's into Anita, and more than that, he's been mindfucked by Micah to be the way Anita will like, which means he's probably only into men for Anita's pleasure and would have no interest in Asher for his own sake.
4) Only a little part of his face? I thought it was half-and-half? Did that change, or is Meph just being charitable/that's how Meph sees it?

Asher tells him he's not beautiful and unbuttons his shirt to show the chest scars. Meph tries to touch him, Asher starts to move away but Nathaniel tells Asher that Asher wants him to touch him. Yes, Nate, maybe, but that doesn't mean he's ready for it, so you stay out of this. Understandably "Asher shot him a not entirely friendly look" but still lets Meph touch his chest. He asks how far down the scars go, Asher asks if he's trying to get him out of his clothes, Meph reminds him that's the point of all this. Nathaniel says yes "and he was looking at Asher. The look said clearly, Don't blow this for yourself just because you are a pain in the ass." HOW DARE ASHER HAVE COMFORT LEVELS, ESPECIALLY WITH NEW PEOPLE! Meph asks if he can see, Asher looks at Anita and she says she doesn't know why so Micah answers him "Don't you want to?" and Asher looks at Anita again and "I understood the pleading now."

Micah is a coercive pressuring dick to everyone, great. Anita also totally misinterprets, in my opinion, just what Asher is pleading for because she crawls over and asks if he wants some help. Asher admittedly nods (I guess he knows he's not getting out of this, poor dude) and Anita has the astounding revelation that he's NERVOUS OMG because a man he likes seems attracted to him and he thinks it's too good to be true. WOW, ANITA, FUCKING BRILLIANT! HOW DO YOU DO IT? Anita tells him to lie back, he does so, his hair "spilled" of course, and Anita thinks about how hot he is. There have to be three sentences of dialogue exchanged between the characters about who is taking his boots off and it's another paragraph before it is actually done. Meph comments he likes the leather, Anita says he'll be seeing a lot of it here. THIS WAS NOT WORTH THE DEATH OF THE DOUBTLESS MILLIONS OF COWS IT TOOK. They get his boots off and his pants open and Meph puts his hand down there and says that the scars stop. Anita says "Not exactly, but we'll have to get him out of the pants to show you what I mean." They then spend a paragraph pulling his pants off.

Meph touches his chest and stomach and then his groin and notes that the scars on the former are a lot deeper than the ones on the latter, "It's like they couldn't bear to ruin your face or your junk." I find this line and idea tremendously funny and I don't know why. Asher then explains that his foreskin was actually all fucked up for over a century and there's three more short paragraphs about Meph touching him, with Anita emphasizing that "He was all about the texture and didn't seem to differentiate between what he was touching, focused only how it felt" which she's also been noting the whole time. Basically, he's not touching Asher sexually, more like a doctor's exam. Yeah, poor Asher can't catch a break; even when a dude fondles him and calls him pretty, he's treating him more like an interesting specimen than a lover.

We then get two fucking paragraphs about the scar on Asher's balls. My favorite like is that "the scar on Asher's balls was harder to touch, because the skin moved." Male mice can retract their balls up into themselves. Sometimes they have a full sac hanging down, other times they can pass for female at a glance. That's what this makes me think of. I guess any body part would retreat at the advance of Anita's touch! There is then a big long (no pun intended) paragraph on Meph touching the balls while Anita strokes his cock and how Meph isn't really playing with 'em like Asher likes, just touching the scar, and how she "still couldn't tell if Mephistopheles was okay with touching another man, or if he was just after the texture in an almost nonsexual." Almost. Normally I'd make fun of that and the idea a person could never be touching someone non-sexually in a sexual spot during what is supposed to be an orgy, but I guess admittedly at this point I am thinking he has a scar/texture kink. Also yes Anita he is clearly okay with touching another man as evident by the fact he's doing it of his own volition. I believe want you mean is 'touching with sexual intent' or something similar.

Asher gets a hard-on, Meph then starts exploring "the texture of the skin and the delicate bits inside". So like...is he smushing the balls so he can feel the actual gonadals inside the testicle sac, I guess? It sounds from the description like he's poking his fingers INSIDE the balls to poke at those, but given there's no gore and screaming I guess not. Anita thinks that "I wasn't sure how to move past this, or if I should" because Asher is getting so much attention and she doesn't want to spoil it for him (LOL YEAH RIGHT, ANITA BEING OKAY WITH SOMEONE ELSE GETTING ATTENTION) so "I looked at Micah for a clue, or an assist" but it's Nathaniel who pipes up that "There are enough of us to do oral on two of us at the same time." I had to read this twice to make sense of that. Meph asks who does who, and they spend a page and a third discussing that in the most non-sexy and bland way possible, of course. The only parts worth noting about this back and forth is that when Meph says that girls scream when he gives them head is that Anita scoffs "Screaming, so girl." MAN, HOW LAME AND GIRLY TO SCREAM WHEN YOU ORGASM, ANITA NEVER DOES THAT...except all those times she's "screaming her passion to the ceiling" and the like, and Asher warning Meph that when a vampire goes down to you, fangs get involved, so don't ask for it from him unless you like pain. So no vampire ever figured out a way around that? Especially Asher, who likes cock and has been around quite awhile? I guess depending how big they are and if they're angled in any way...you know what, not gonna think about it.

I don't know quite what to think about this chapter. The first time I went through it I just hated it because of how long it took without anything actually happening, but now that I've gone through a second time to spork it, I do appreciate that all this time and attention was given to Asher, which realistically he'd need. I guess my verdict is that it would be okay (though still with some trimming and a little more eroticism) if the rest of the book wasn't such a similar drag.

Comments

[ex-naomi-ja.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure when Asher first showed up, half his face was scarred, because Anita would so often bang on about he expert he was at using shadow and light to hide the ruined half, and how he let his hair fall just so to hide it and so on. She's definitely retconned how bad the scarring is. Either that or he got fixed off-page, which wouldn't surprise me, because so many interesting and important things happen off-page these days, in order to make way for Anita snarking at how girly/manly everything and everyone is.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

We find out in the Bullet epilogue that a BUNCH of badass awesome shit happens offscreen. It pissed me off so much.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

I believe it got retconned as having sex with Anita/power from her/JC were helping heal the scars so they weren't as severe as when he first showed up. Sorta the same way that Anita prettified Damian and fixed his broken nose by fucking him that one time.

[watersheerie.livejournal.com]

Kissing with teeth sounds unpleasant enough, but what does doing it gently mean? Rubbing your teeth together but not really hard?

I'm not sure you can do it gently. Generally, when kissing does involve teeth, it usually means rough or an aggressive form of kissing. Unless the teeth part means 'nibbling', but why not use 'nibbling' then?

I do appreciate that all this time and attention was given to Asher, which realistically he'd need.

The attention to Asher and his needs are nice, but again it's all filtered through Anita. Asher can't have sex with men or the man he loves unless Anita is somehow involved. It isn't Asher's pleasure, it's Anita gaining pleasure and whatever spills over Asher gets to have. I get the feeling that Meph was solely created just to give Asher something so he wouldn't bitch about not having JC, but again Anita has to play with Meph first because the universe revolves around her and Asher can fuck off because he won't play her little games anymore.

I know LKH likes to think she's progressive in regards to homosexuality, but she treats it like some sort of fetish. Homosexual sex is like this weird, kinky things that the guys do to please Anita. The few purely homosexual men are treated as being overly dramatic with no sense of boundaries, like Narci and Asher. They can't really please Anita because they are purely gay, so instead they get vilified.

LKH and Anita both seem to see gay men as not being actual people, but instead some sort of weird kink. Which is why straight men who refuse to indulge Anita's 'gay fetish' are seen as being evil and homophobic. It's not actually about homophobia, the real problem Anita has is these men are refusing to cater to her sexual desires by fucking one another, but since she can't outright admit that she sees homosexuality as a fetish, she tries to brush it off as homophobia (Richard).

We're going to see more of this with Jade, a 'lesbian' toy created purely for Anita to explore more sexual kinks. Cause homosexuality is a kink and all homosexuals are whiny perverts according to LKH.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

but she treats it like some sort of fetish...Homosexual sex is like this weird, kinky things that the guys do to please Anita.....LKH and Anita both seem to see gay men as not being actual people, but instead some sort of weird kink.

Ugh, indeed.

[dwg.livejournal.com]

This whole thing is all the more tragic/hilarious when you think back to Belle Morte's supposed evilness is because she enjoys watching dudes fuck each other too and makes them do it for her pleasure even when they don't want to thanks to the arduer.

But oh no, Anita's so much better than that because she's all about ~choice love consent because LKH says so.

[lady-fellshot.livejournal.com]

This does not read like a sex scene. At all. This reads like filing forms in to the DMV in one's underpants. Painfully awkward and dreadfully boring at the same time.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, perfect comparison!

[subtle-shades.livejournal.com]

I miss the earlier bits of JC and Asher's characterizations when they both have preferences, and in opposite directions, but they're just preferences, rather than strong ones that preclude them being together. As it is, I have the vague feeling that Asher's type is meant to toss JC out of the running for Asher's Tru Wuv and JC's "strong" preference for women is meant to keep Asher for even trying for Number One Lover, much less Tru Wuv. Anita, of course, fits both of their stated preferences to a T.

I also deeply and passionately loathe Julianna being retconned into a shared sex toy. I know that, given Anita's fragile ego, the narrative can't/won't accord Julianna (or any other character) the respect that she deserves, but she deserves better than being the Vagina that Brought Them Together And Bridged The Gap (Mind The Gap!). I like the way that LKH inadvertently set it up earlier where Asher is old enough to have a human servant when he meets JC and JC hooks up with Julianna and Asher at the same time. That set up certainly accords all three characters more respect (and less loathesome personalities) than the new version of their shared history. Plus, it gives the reader an idea of what Asher lost when he lost Julianna - he loved her, she loved him, their union made him powerful enough to leave Belle's court with one of her line's youngest, prettiest vampires and he lost all of that.

And the new story makes no sense. If Julianna was simply a concession to get JC into his bed, then it makes no sense for Asher to hate JC for over two hundred years over her loss. And, if she was so unimportant to Asher, it makes even less sense for Asher to petition the Council for the right to kill Anita and for the Council to seriously consider it even before rumors of JC's secret ambition for an American Council start making the rounds. And JC is quite clearly still enamored with the Asher-Julianna-JC period of his life, as evidenced by all of the paintings of it that are casually hanging around his lair.

Anita and LKH may bang on and on and on that Anita is the first love that JC has ever had, (which, again, makes no sense even in a world where Julianna means very little/nothing to Asher since, even with that stupid retcon, Julianna should still mean everything to JC) but given his age and his backstory with Asher, and even quite aside from Julianna, that simply isn't possible. If Jean-Claude had actually managed to go four hundred+ years without ever romantically loving any other person, then there's an argument to be made that he can't romantically love another.

Of course, if Asher originally picked Julianna because he loved her and was attracted to her sexually and then they both took JC to their bed later, then there's an argument to be made that busty, petite, dark-haired women might not actually be JC's preferred physical type. He might even like tall, slim, "boyish" blondes best. (*cue dramatic music and horrified shriek*)

....That last thing might be the real reason that Asher's not allowed to ever have a satisfying relationship with anyone, including the two loves of his life.

and kiss with "gentle teeth"
I think that's supposed to be the un-sexiest way ever of describing lip nibbling. Because otherwise, LKH is dipping into her vore fetish again.

Meph asks where she wants him, and Anita admits that maybe for a moment they'd forgotten he was there.
Meph is obviously a very important part of this sex scene.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

I miss the earlier bits of JC and Asher's characterizations when they both have preferences, and in opposite directions, but they're just preferences, rather than strong ones that preclude them being together.
Ugh, seriously. Bi leaning one way or the other should not equal actually BEING straight/gay. That's why it's BI for crying out loud!

I also deeply and passionately loathe Julianna being retconned into a shared sex toy.
UGH YES SIT RAISES MY HACKLES SO MUCH AND I REFUSE TO RECOGNIZE IT AS CANON! Not just because I don't like it but because of all the reasons you pointed out that IT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE! And anything after NiC is pick and choose your own canon anyway in my book (for instance I pretty much refuse Vittorio's claims about Belle Morte being something new and not descended from MOAD)

[subtle-shades.livejournal.com]

"absolutely arrogantly handsome"...she knows that 'handsome' isn't something you can emote, right?
I don't think that she does. Given the context, I think that she believes it to be a synonym for "confident".

Meph smiles, climbs on the bed, and crawls towards them with "a sinuous roll" that is "graceful and lascivious, and promised sex like the air could promise rain" and Anita knows from this that he'll be really good in bed.
These are the descriptions that used to be attached to teenaged!Nathaniel's "flirtations" and movements when he was trying to seduce Anita. Also, that is the exact same train of thought that early Anita used to suppose that Nathaniel was good in bed, even before she started banging him.

Example TWO of Ways In Which Micah Has Altered Meph. (I'm counting your note that Meph is okay with other guys but focused on Anita as Example ONE.)

Since he kneaded her back he can feel there's a scar there and asks to see.
Oh no! Not the I'm-more-scarred-than-you dick-wag-gery! It was boring in the early books and it's even more so now. Additionally, I have to think that even when she used to do her job, Anita was abysmally bad at it. Not just because she did stupid, cruel, and senseless things but because she's all scarred up. Edward isn't covered with scars. And even Bernardo, whom Edward originally said was abysmal at things like vampire hunting, doesn't have any scars. Only Anita does. Her scars could be taken as a Sue-thing or even part of her imaginary penis, but it seems more like a female vampire hunter = incompetent thing.

And the scattered remnants of Meph's mind (and LKH's subconscious) are clearly trolling Anita.

Also, Napoleon complexes are apparently highly communicable.

She finishes her show by saying how everyone that hurt her is dead now.
That sounds like wish fulfillment.

Meph says the scars "barely cover any of your face, just this little part."
Meph finding JC and Asher to be the HAWTEST THINGS EVER = Example Number THREE of Micah's improvements. It seems odd that Meph would echo Anita's thoughts on the subject of JC and Asher to a T.

And I agree with you that, while LKH may see this as a resolution to the stuff at the beginning, it's not. Even if Meph might, under other circumstances, genuinely think that Asher is lovely, he's Anita's toy. Anita is notoriously terrible at acknowledging other people's person-hood and independence and right to make personal decisions for themselves. Her brainwshed toys, I'd imagine, would have even less latitude. And he's now Anita-sexual, which (as you said) means sex-with-Anita's-pleasure-in-mind rather than with the other person. Asher will be terribly disappointed in Meph if he mistakes Meph's current attentions for genuine interest.

Also, those scars have been seriously retconned. When Asher first showed up, the scars covered half of his face. Anita spent a lot of Burnt Offerings discussing how his face, chest, and thigh were a mess of twisted and gross scar tissue with perfectly working muscle tissue underneath. (Which seems unlikely.) Anita considered herself quite brave and tolerant and generous for being capable of staring at him with slack-jawed horror and without blinking or looking away. When Asher called out on her behavior, Anita said that she's a hair and eye person which was a blatant and terrible lie even back then. Also, she continued to stare at Asher despite knowing that it made him incredibly uncomfortable. Given his self-esteem issues, Asher eventually reacted about like you would expect -- he threw a fit, got egged into opening his shirt up for Anita to gap at his other scars, clawed at the scarred side of his face and chest until they were bloody, and fled the car. He flew off so quickly that he forgot his coat. (Which, yeah, is pretty damn sensitive for a vampire. But, on the other hand, Anita behaved really badly.)

Anita mentally shrugs and (after fetishizing her weapons and randomly shooting someone) puts on his ugly duster. She uses it as an excuse to remark at length on Asher's height compared to her teeny, tiny self.

....Yeah, that was a meeting that will clearly end in semi-romance by the end of the book.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Additionally, I have to think that even when she used to do her job, Anita was abysmally bad at it. Not just because she did stupid, cruel, and senseless things but because she's all scarred up. Edward isn't covered with scars. And even Bernardo, whom Edward originally said was abysmal at things like vampire hunting, doesn't have any scars. Only Anita does.
I never thought of that! Out of universe, it probably is just that LKH never bothered to think about what scars they might have, but in-universe, it does suggest she fucks up a lot. And fucking up more than Edward, well, who doesn't, but Bernardo gets pissed on all the time (at least he did in Skin Trade) so...

Anita mentally shrugs and (after fetishizing her weapons and randomly shooting someone) puts on his ugly duster. She uses it as an excuse to remark at length on Asher's height compared to her teeny, tiny self.
whaaat the actual fuck

[subtle-shades.livejournal.com]

He asks how far down the scars go
Everyone and their cousins ask Asher this. Apparently, manners are not a thing in this universe.

"I understood the pleading now."

I think it's pretty odd( and somewhat telling) that we're never shown Asher undressing himself for sex. And the fact that Asher is nearly always described as "pleading" and "reluctant" just before Anita helpfully divests him of his clothes or drags him into bed is downright ominous. Fortunately we've got Micah and Nathaniel to strong arm their reluctant sex object to play along with their mutual desires. No wonder Micah brainwashed Meph into complete subservient compliance! Constantly having to overcome all of that free will and all of those leery objections to whatever he wants must be so tiresome for Micah.

a man he likes seems attracted to him and he thinks it's too good to be true.
It IS too good to be true. I'm calling it now. In the long run, this isn't going to work out for Asher. Either Anita will refuse to share Meph or Meph will cease to be bi when Anita isn't there to appreciate the ghey sexxors.

Anita tells him to lie back
...and think of Jean-Claude England.

It's astounding that no one in these books can just do anything without discussing it to death first. Asher should just kick Micah in his stupid face with one of his perfectly polished boots and storm out.

"It's like they couldn't bear to ruin your face or your junk."
I find this amusing, mostly because those are the two parts of the body that Anita puts the most stock by and, therefore, are non-negotiable with her. It's like the Inquisitioners knew exactly what Anita looks for in a man!

"He was all about the texture and didn't seem to differentiate between what he was touching, focused only how it felt"
Example Number FOUR of Ways In Which Meph Reflects Anita's Tastes. That "you pretty lab specimen" thing is exactly how Anita used to describe her personal interest in Asher and the ways in which she touched him. The fact that, even in this scene, she's still entirely focused on the texture of each of his parts, as if he's a jumble of bits across her bed, shows that it's still the way that Anita interacts with Asher's body... and Asher himself. This scar/texture thing shows up in her loving descriptions of her own scars (and why people should admire them), in Nick's missing eye, and it used to show up with regards to JC's back and cross scars (before they were forgotten or retconned.) This is Anita's kink showing up in Meph's actions/reactions towards Asher.

Meph complained earlier that Anita wasn't seeing him, just making a list of his parts. Well, this is proof that she really only sees the parts of them that she's interested in or turned on by.

And I'm sure that Asher deeply appreciates Anita discussing his textured features with Meph as if he's not there or incapable of speaking for himself.

Meph isn't really playing with 'em like Asher likes
It's telling that, even when Asher gets what he wants here and in the orgy scene, it's only after Anita has played with all the toys first in front of him and that the sex is neither about him or really what he wants -- emotional connection, a lover of his very own, and someone who genuinely finds him attractive.

It's also telling that, since Asher is assuming the "girl" role and being "seduced" by Anita, Nathaniel, Micah, and Meph, he's the one who's on his back, lying perfectly still, and silent, while the others do as they please with his body (even if it's not something that he enjoys). That's Anita's usual role/position during sexual intercourse. That was also, by the way, Envy's "job" during her threesome with JC and Richard. It's a weird and uncomfortable dynamic.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Everyone and their cousins ask Asher this. Apparently, manners are not a thing in this universe.
I'm so baffled as to why this would even enter someone's head. There was a girl who went to my college who had clearly been in a fire or else had some kind of horrible skin/scarring disorder that made her look like it. We weren't friends but we were friendly, knew names, etc. I can honestly say I never fucking wondered 'how far the scars went' on her. Granted, it might have been different if I'd been in bed with her and about to fuck like Meph and Asher, but, as you point out, it's not just Meph who asks this.

I think it's pretty odd( and somewhat telling) that we're never shown Asher undressing himself for sex
Hmmm, indeed.

and think of Jean-Claude England.
Hahahaha!

It's like the Inquisitioners knew exactly what Anita looks for in a man!
The universe bends itself to accommodate Sues, even centuries before they are born!

It's also telling that, since Asher is assuming the "girl" role and being "seduced" by Anita, Nathaniel, Micah, and Meph, he's the one who's on his back, lying perfectly still, and silent, while the others do as they please with his body (even if it's not something that he enjoys). That's Anita's usual role/position during sexual intercourse. That was also, by the way, Envy's "job" during her threesome with JC and Richard. It's a weird and uncomfortable dynamic.
AUGH YOU'RE RIGHT DDDD8

[wanderingworlds.livejournal.com]

Asher should just kick Micah in his stupid face with one of his perfectly polished boots and storm out.

He should kick Nathaniel, too, for his snide comments.

And then just go to Narci's.

[viridian5.livejournal.com]

Apparently, manners are not a thing in this universe.

Of course, because it's a universe Anita is queen of.

[nic echo (from livejournal.com)]

a man he likes seems attracted to him and he thinks it's too good to be true.
It IS too good to be true. I'm calling it now. In the long run, this isn't going to work out for Asher. Either Anita will refuse to share Meph or Meph will cease to be bi when Anita isn't there to appreciate the ghey sexxors.

You have no idea. What happens is Asher and Dev start dating, but Asher wants the two of them to be monogamous (and I can't blame him), but Dev is all, "Noooo, I can't. I'm bi so I have to have both sexes to sleep with," so poor Asher is left out in the cold, and guess what happens? Literally moments after they break up, Dev has sex with Anita. But she feels bad for them. Truly.

[subtle-shades.livejournal.com]

because Asher is getting so much attention and she doesn't want to spoil it for him
Yeeeaahh, right. Anita said the exact same thing just before distracting JC at a delicate moment, potentially ruining his and Envy's orgasms.

"There are enough of us to do oral on two of us at the same time."
a.)This is a terribly, terribly phrased sentence.
b.) In what world are five people incapable of giving five blowjobs simultaneously? How does it take 1.5 people to give one blowjob and 3 people to give two blowjobs? This is bad math and bad sex. Attending a math class would be preferable to attending this orgy.

Asher warning Meph that when a vampire goes down to you, fangs get involved, so don't ask for it from him unless you like pain.
At the beginning of the series, Anita sneers at the baby vamps for flashing their fangs when they don't mean to. And JC says that only baby vamps flash their fangs or have accidents with them. Anita admits to having cut her tongue up a bit on JC's fangs before she got the trick of sticking her tongue down his throat without cutting herself, but she never says that JC cut her with his fangs while kissing. And JC says something in one of the earlier "sex" scenes about Anita letting him put every part of himself in every one of her holes (which leads to some disturbing mental images) which strongly implies a tongue in, uh, non-mouth places. With all of that circumstantial evidence, I'd think an older vamp would be able to give a guy a blowjob. And Asher is certainly old enough to know how to manage his fangs.

I think this an another attempt to make the bi and gay characters not so gay, like all those gay men who find Anita's vagina to be the best sex ever and JC deciding that man-sex (especially if it involves butt sex and regardless of which side of the equation he'd be on) is a no-go without tits in the room. Asher, JC, and all of those bi/gay characters being great at cock sucking would unequivocally state that they do sexual things that don't involve girls even in passing... or so that those girls can watch. They do them for the fun of doing them with other guys! And to pleasure those other guys! They might really be into guys and not just magnanimously catering to Anita's fetishes!

And dude, sex without Anita isn't even a thing in this 'verse. (Seriously. At this point, even if it happens off of the pages or elsewhere, her date rape magic is involved. Just as JJ and that were-swan.)


Despite all of my criticisms, I actually want to like this chapter despite the fact that it's even less sexy than a visit to the gynecologist's. I like it when characters' pre-established personalities are catered to and I like it when characters who are supposed to be in a relationship or have an emotional connection are kind to each other. And Asher is one of my favorite characters. But the pace is grindingly slow even after all of your valiant pruning and the sexual bits are embarrassingly awful and unsexy at best and dub to non-con at worst. There's still the issue of Nathaniel and Micah working together to guilt and shove Asher into getting naked and the gibbering voice at the back of my head that keeps insisting that they're all raping Meph and it's not okay, both of which seriously detract from any enjoyment I might've gotten from this little bit of thoughtfulness to the point where I not only get no enjoyment but I strongly dislike this scene. (But then, I expect I'll strongly dislike anyone doing anything even vaguely sexual with Meph while he's lobotomized.) And then there's the fact that even when the scene is ostensibly about Asher and bullying him into being naked and "comfortable", it's really about fulfilling Anita's m/m kinks.

...So I like the idea of a scene like this but I loathe the execution, is where I'd like to end up with all of this.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Yeeeaahh, right. Anita said the exact same thing just before distracting JC at a delicate moment, potentially ruining his and Envy's orgasms.
I totally want to work a moment like this into Sue vs Sue now.

And dude, sex without Anita isn't even a thing in this 'verse. (Seriously. At this point, even if it happens off of the pages or elsewhere, her date rape magic is involved. Just as JJ and that were-swan.)
Oh my gosh, you are right again! I'm a little jealous of your ability to spot this stuff (not to mention your AMAZING memory) but also I'm kind of glad that I can't because I feel like it would make my head asplode even more than it already does from all the awful in this series.

...So I like the idea of a scene like this but I loathe the execution, is where I'd like to end up with all of this.
Yeah, I'd say that's about the same with me.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

OOOH UTENA ICON! I LIKE YOU!

Hey, I used to love it too. Different reasons for me, having always been more of a fantasy/horror fan than a noir fan (I didn't even know what noir was, actually, at the age I started them) and I think that's why I'm so devoted to hating it now. If I'd never liked it at all and never found anything good about it, I just...wouldn't care about how bad it got. But I loved it, and it had a world I was so intrigued by, and could go so many awesome places. So I really resent that being taken away in the name of sex and Mary Sue fantasies. I think that's how it is for a lot of us here, that we're ex-fans, not people who were never fans at all.

There was a vampire named Aubrey in the first book, but the guy you're thinking of is Valentine. He was also in the first, so easy mistake to make there ;D
http://anitablake.wikia.com/wiki/Valentine
That's quite possible. She might have really liked the idea of a scarred-face vamp after she used him, and decided that, since she can't bring him back since he's dead (and also liked little boys) how about making a new one? One that will end up with Anita, no less. I'm actually kind of surprised there aren't a lot more vampires with holy water face scars, actually. You'd think a lot of panicked people would toss holy water (which I imagine a lot carry on hand in this universe) at a vampire when one approached, and the face would be one of the easiest places to hit, since it's not covered by clothing.

[wanderingworlds.livejournal.com]

1. Um... so she crawled up on him like a kitty cat? Because that's what Envy did to JC.

2. I forget that Asher even has scars until it's like "OH AND HE'S SUPER SELF-CONSCIOUS, M'KAY?"

3. Kissing with gentle teeth? I just imagined them like pulling their lips back so that their teeth are clacking together. NOPE. NO LIPS HERE GUYS.

4. I kind of like how Nathaniel is literally just chillin' in the chair all "No, don't mind me, by all means go ahead. I'm just here to watch" and I imagine it with the smuggest, shit-eating grin on his face, too. I make him so much more fun. Actually I kind of just turn him into Damian.

5. A sinuous roll? I just imagined Mephisto doing the Caterpillar on the bed naked.

6. I don't remember seeing heat in men's eyes. Maybe I'm just blind to it, though. But if heat is legit coming from someone's eyes in waves I think they should probably get that looked at.

7. Well at least this time with lips and tongue AND teeth, he's probably nipping and biting and pulling on her lower lip, or just nibbling on other parts of her. Like that makes a lot of sense than the "kissing with gentle teeth" thing.

8. I wish he'd start using his claws and scratch the fuck out of her skin, because claws are hooked so he'd just start ripping chunks up, while he's kneading. Because God forbid MY cat can knead anything without doing that. BUT LOOOOL HIM SPRAYING EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE. OMFG IF ALL THE BIG MALE CATS JUST SPRAYED THE FUCK OUT OF SHIT FOR TERRITORY I WOULD DIE LAUGHING. *whacks Mephisto with a rolled up newspaper* No, bad kitty.

9. AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA "DID YOU FALL ON IT?" AHAHAHAHA CAN'T BREATHE OMFG I LOVE YOU MEPHISTO

10. I'm so confused... BUT AWW ASHER BABY YOU WERE ALL STIFF AND UNCOMFORTABLE AND LET ME LOVE YOU AND GIVE YOU HUGS JUST DON'T BITE OKAY I'M NOT IN THE MOOD.

11. *fingers in ears in denial about the whole Micah mindrape thing* LALALALALALAAAAAAAAA

12. I dunno. I had a RP going where my character got scarred up by acid and her love interest at the time became fascinated by just touching on the scars, because of the texture. It was a humiliating experience for her, but for him it was a curiosity and his trying to prove he didn't have a problem touching the imperfections. I'm not sure if that's where LKH is trying to go with this, because if she is, she failed horribly. HORRIBLY. But that's no surprise. She can't write fluff to save her life. She couldn't write fluff if she was in a room full of kittens.

13. She really should win an award for Least Sexy Sex Scenes Ever

14. Nate's back. He's making snarky commentary on this 3-maybe-4-some. Because even though Anita wanted the vampire-girl-therian thing, Micah is still participating.

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

4) hahaha, that's how I imagine him too!

8) SRSLY THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN MORE IN SERIES WITH WERECATS!

12) Nah, I don't think that's what she was going for. Though to be fair I have NO IDEA what she actually was going for.

[aikaterini.livejournal.com]

/Do asexual men have this heat?/

Oh, don’t be silly. Asexual people don’t exist in Anita’s world, remember?

/HOW DARE ASHER HAVE COMFORT LEVELS, ESPECIALLY WITH NEW PEOPLE!/

Anita has no concept of personal boundaries, so it’s not surprising that Mephistopheles, who has been brainwashed to meet her needs, doesn’t either.

/MAN, HOW LAME AND GIRLY TO SCREAM WHEN YOU ORGASM, ANITA NEVER DOES THAT...except all those times she's "screaming her passion to the ceiling" and the like/

I bet that Anita’s head would explode if she ever read yaoi fanfics. In many of them, at least one of the men usually screams when he orgasms.

Also, yes, hypocrisy much, Anita? You scream all the time during sex. Does that mean that you’re “girly?” Or is it only bad when men do it?

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Asexual people don’t exist in Anita’s world, remember?
Save for Morte D'Amour, who does not like sex...but enjoys raping people for their pain and fear :/

Does that mean that you’re “girly?” Or is it only bad when men do it?
It's bad when other women do it!

[baeraad.livejournal.com]

Fun fact: for some reason, whenever I think about this series now, I automatically think, "Anita and her stupid vagina don't need any more superpowers." (which is something you said at one point, though I can't remember when) It just... sums up the whole thing so well.

YOU ARE SHORT ANITA NEVER SHUTS UP ABOUT IT I BET SHE PATS YOUR HEAD AND BABYTALKS ABOUT HOW TEENY TINY YOU ARE TO YOU

... yeah. You just know she does, don't you? Of course she does. *groans*

So like...is he smushing the balls so he can feel the actual gonadals inside the testicle sac, I guess?

NO NO NO OW OW OW DO NOT WANT! D<

... ahem. Sorry. It was the combination of "gonads" and... "smushing." ^_^;;

[rodentfanatic.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I have no experience with balls beyond laughing at the huge ones my rats drag around behind them (rat testicles = THE SIZE OF THEIR HEADS LOL) but I imagined that would probably be uncomfy at the very least. I've heard some guys like 'em played with but I think there's a difference between that and this.

[subtle-shades.livejournal.com]

*sharp inhale* Nnooooo! Not Edward! Spare Edward! *has NOT read the book flog and is now very, very afraid!*